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heart. And something like that shouldn’t have happened to you. It just shouldn’t have happened. And—”
    “Hi, I got cut off before I could finish the earlier message, so this isn’t another call—just a continuation of the last one. Sorry about the rambling. What I mostly want to say is that I really liked the person I met that...that night, and I’d like to get to know you better. But only if you want to. If you don’t, I can respect that, and I won’t call again.”
    That was the last message. He hadn’t called again.
    I stared at the phone in my hand, realizing that my mind was starting to get fuzzy. But I suddenly felt an overwhelming flood of guilt. Gideon had been beaten to the floor in that row house, in that room. For me . All he wanted now was a call back, and I hadn’t even given him that.
    Without thinking, I found his number and hit send.
    It was after midnight, a fact I realized after the fourth ring. I’d just leave a message, to thank him. Then at least that one thing wouldn’t be left unfinished.
    I was fighting through a growing haze in my mind, preparing to leave a message, when his voice was suddenly on the other end of the call.
    “Hello? Hello, Diana?”
    “Yeah,” I managed to say, surprised and disoriented and groggy. “Yeah, it’s me.”
    It felt like there was some sort of emotion in the brief silence that followed, but I was in no state for figuring out what it was. Then he said, almost diffidently, “Hi.”
    “Hi.” I felt strangely embarrassed, despite everything.
    “I’m glad you called.”
    “Sorry it’s so late. I...I wasn’t thinking.”
    “It’s not too late. I’m really glad you did. Where are you?”
    “I’m back in my apartment.”
    “Oh. That’s good. Where do you live?”
    I told him because he sounded genuinely interested and because it didn’t matter anymore.
    “Really?” he said. “I think I know where that is. My place isn’t very far away.”
    Then the conversation drifted into silence. At last, he asked in a different tone, “How are you?”
    There was no way in the world I could answer that question. I wasn’t even sure I could raise my head. “I just wanted to tell you...I just wanted to say thank you. For what you did. For fighting for me.”
    There was a pause on the line before he answered, “I’m sorry it wasn’t enough. That what I did couldn’t help.”
    “I think it...” I had to clear my throat, since my words were starting to slur. “I think it did help. A little. Knowing that there was someone in the world who would do that for me, for a stranger. It was like a little glimmer of light in the darkness.”
    The pause was much longer this time, and it felt like it was full of emotion. Finally, he murmured, something rough in his voice, “There should have been more light for you.”
    The world and the room were darker than ever now. I could feel the pills closing in. “But still, it meant something to me. It was the last one I’ll see.”
    The pause this time felt different, although there was no way I could work out why. Gideon’s tone was different too when he asked, “What do you mean?”
    I didn’t answer. I wasn’t sure I could make my mouth form lucid words. I just breathed into the phone. My hand was starting to shake.
    “Diana?” His voice had gotten urgent, grating on my ears. “Diana, what’s wrong? What’s happening?”
    “It’s just...dark.” I didn’t know if he could even understand the mumbled words, but the phone slipped out of my hand.
    It fell on the bed, kind of near my ear, so I could still hear Gideon’s voice, talking urgently with words I couldn’t quite make out.
    It was all a dark, thick haze, but I wasn’t entirely unconscious. And my whole body jerked when my stomach heaved and I started to gag on my vomit.
    My body might have been made of lead, but I managed to roll over on my side so I didn’t choke.
    I hadn’t really thought about things before I took the pills, but I’m