Rude Astronauts Read Online Free PDF Page A

knew it was all a joke to him. People walking on the Moon was a funny stunt we had pulled a long time ago. A human cannonball trick in the circus. I could see what he thought of me. Moon Man.”
    Nobody laughed. Dick and Howard looked at him for awhile, and Roy studied his front lawn. It had rained the day before last, it needed mowing again, the honeysuckle bush next to the driveway had to be trimmed …
    Damn, why did it hurt so much?
    “Was he old enough to remember?” Howie asked. Roy nodded, and Howie shook his head. “He was probably one of the ones who bitched when the Lucy show was pre-empted for live coverage of our shot.” He sipped his beer. “Am I the only one who doesn’t miss the silly bitch?”
    “I wanted to slug him,” Roy said softly. “Not because of me. Because of his attitude about everything we had done.”
    The three of them were quiet for a little while, reflecting. Tree frogs and crickets communicated with the night. Suddenly, across the lake, a skyrocket went off. It shot in a sputtering gunpowder arc over the lake, snapping and shrieking over the distant yells of the teenagers on the far shore, then detonated in a red and violet umbrella. They heard the front screen door open and slam closed, saw Ronnie and Jack running out onto the front lawn to watch. After a few minutes another skyrocket went up, but it fizzled out and disappeared over the waters. “Ahhhhhhhhhh,” moaned the kids.
    “Happy Fourth of July,” Roy said. He picked up his Coors and toasted his friends. Howie and Dick picked up their beers, tapped bottle against bottle, and they slugged down the brew.
    “I love the Fourth of July,” Howie said.
    “You haven’t answered my question,” Dick said to Roy. “If you could go back to the Moon …?”
    “Would I?” Roy watched another skyrocket launch over the lake. This one was more successful; it exploded in a yellow fire-blossom. He looked back at Dick. “I can’t, so why do you want to know?”
    Dick contemplated the lake for a moment. “You can go back,” he said finally. “America’s going back up there.”
    “Oh,” replied Howie casually. “Tomorrow, or next week?”
    “Probably in another ten years,” Dick replied drily. “We could feasibly get one or two people there by ’01, but if we take that approach it’ll be a quick-and-dirty job again, and nobody wants to do that. The prime objective is to establish a permanent manned presence in the first decade of the next century, so the thinking is to send a major expedition.”
    Roy nodded sagely, absently chipping at the label on his beer bottle with his thumbnail. “Yeah, I’ve heard that NASA’s taken a new interest in the Moon. I’ll always second the motion, but I’m telling you, it’s going to be the same song and dance with Congress. They won’t fund it, and without the bucks we’re just telling science fiction stories.”
    Dick smiled; he leaned back in his chair and cupped the back of his head in his hands. “It’s not science fiction, Roy. It’s going to happen. And we won’t have to worry about Congress, either.”
    He was so self-assured that Roy’s attention was caught. He stared at his former teammate. “You’re not bullshitting me, are you?” Dick’s smile grew broader, and he shook his head.
    “Is this coming out of Johnson?”
    Dick slowly shook his head again.
    “Is it serious?”
    Dick nodded.
    “Why?” asked Howie.
    “Why not?” replied Dick.
    “C’mon. If it’s serious, there’s got to be a better reason than that. Congress …”
    “Screw Congress,” Dick said softly. “It’s coming out of one of the privates. All we need is use of NASA facilities at the Cape. When the proposal is formalized and made public, Congress will go along with it. So will the White House, and so will the public. It’ll be an offer they can’t refuse.”
    “So what’s the reason?” Roy prodded.
    Dick looked back at him. “Sorry, Eject, I can’t tell you that. At least not