Revenge of the Snob Squad Read Online Free PDF Page A

Camaro squealed around the corner. “He had a
     job interview this afternoon.”
    “Oh, yeah? Who with?”
    “He didn’t say. He did say you called and told him you had a meeting after school.”
    I tossed my backpack on the couch and flopped down next to it. “That’s right. You’ll be glad to know I’ve joined a club.”
    Mom perched on the La-Z-Boy next to me. She folded her hands in her lap. “Really? What kind of club?”
    “Oh, a girls club. You know.”
    “No, I don’t know. What’s the name of this club?”
    “The, uh—” I yawned. “SnobgarbleSquadgarble.” She still looked dubious. “We do good deeds, make pledges, that kind of stuff.
     A girls club.”
    “Do you sell cookies?” Mom smiled.
    I snapped my fingers. “Now there’s an idea.”
    Her face sobered again. “Jenny—”
    “And,” I went on, “you’ll be glad to know that my problem is under control. My class is involved in a fitness program until
     the end of the year. There’re rigorous workouts every day. No doubt I’ll drop twenty, twenty-five pounds without even trying.”
     I grinned. “So, you can forget about the shrink.”
    She winced at the word. Not hard enough. “I already made an appointment,” she said.
    I freaked. “Cancel it.”
    She stood. “I couldn’t get you in until the twenty-first, though. Can you believe how booked up these people are? I can’t
     imagine there are that many kids with”—she blinked away—“problems.”
    “Major problems, Mom. Major. You don’t want to burden them with my piddly stuff. What’s a few extra pounds when people are
     slitting their wrists, smoking dope, driving without a license—”
    Just then Vanessa came tearing out of her room. “Mom, can you take me down to Milton’s Music? My last reed just split.”
    Mom sighed. “Sure,” she said.
    Wait a minute, I wanted to scream. Remember me? This vital discussion we’re having about my life? “Really, Mom. You can cancel
     the appointment.” I pushed to my feet.
    “I don’t think so.” She grabbed her purse.
    Right there I suffered a severe emotional trauma. I lost my appetite. Vanessa got the aftershock. On her way past me I said,
     “Gee, those jeans are getting a little tight across the butt.”
    She screeched to a stop.
    Mom snapped, “Jennifer!”
    “Oops.” I covered my mouth. “Not nice. I forgot.”
    Vanessa twisted around. “Are they?” She met my eyes.
    What could I say? With my thumb and index finger, I zipped my lip.
    “Jenny!” Mom yelled again. To Vanessa she said, “They look fine.”
    Vanessa sprinted back to her room. “I’m going to change.”
    Mom turned to me. If looks could fry, I’d be deep fat.
    I couldn’t wait to get out of the house the next morning. Dad didn’t get the job, whatever it was, so he and Mom had a huge
     argument in the basement. They’d been going at it down there a lot lately, like we couldn’t hear. Dinner was total silence.
     Breakfast, too. My two favorite times of the day, ruined. Add to that watching Vanessa cut every Cheerio in half
before
she chewed it fifty times—hello?
Who
needs a shrink?
    The promise of gym class got me through the morning, because today we implemented the Prairie Plan. Yee-haw.
    “All right, Solano, give it to me,” Max said, extending her hand. We were huddled behind the bleachers, psyching ourselves
     up. Some might say acting like retards.
    “Hold it.” Lydia crushed herself between us. “This is my revenge. I get to do it.”
    Max sagged visibly. She really wanted the honor. With a heavy heart, she dropped her arm.
    “Be sure to get it on real thick,” Max grumbled. She trailed Lydia to the running track while Prairie and I formed the daring
     duo at the rear.
    “I know. I’m not a total idiot,” Lydia said over her shoulder.
    “Just half a one,” I muttered. Prairie giggled. Max smirked.
    We watched Lydia tuck the ammunition into the stretch band of her pants and pull her blouse out to cover it. Real