Regeneration Read Online Free PDF Page B

therapeutic, but then Rivers suspected that writing the Declaration might have been therapeutic too. He thought that Sassoon’s poetry and his protest sprang from a single source, and each could be linked to his recovery from that terrible period of nightmares and hallucinations. If that was true, then persuading Sassoon to give in and go back would be a much more complicated and risky business than he had thought, and might well precipitate a relapse.
    He sighed and put the poems back in the envelope. Looking at his watch, he saw that it was time to start his rounds. He’d just reached the foot of the main staircase when he saw Captain Campbell, bent double and walking backwards, emerge from the darkened dining room.
    ‘Campbell?’
    Campbell spun round. ‘Ah, Captain Rivers, just the man.’ He came up to Rivers and, speaking in a discreet whisper that was audible the length and breadth of the corridor, as Campbell’s discreet whispers tended to be, said, ‘That fella they’ve put in my room.’
    ‘Sassoon. Yes?’
    ‘Don’t think he’s a German spy, do you?’
    Rivers gave the matter careful consideration. ‘No, I don’t think so. They never call themselves “Siegfried”.’
    Campbell looked astonished. ‘No more they do.’ He nodded, patted Rivers briskly on the shoulder, and moved off. ‘Just thought I’d mention it,’ he called back.
    ‘Thank you, Campbell. Much appreciated.’
    Rivers stood for a moment at the foot of the stairs, unconsciously shaking his head.

4
    __________
    ‘I was walking up the drive at home. My wife was on the lawn having tea with some other ladies, they were all wearing white. As I got closer, my wife stood up and smiled and waved and then her expression changed and all the other ladies began to look at each other. I couldn’t understand why, and then I looked down and saw that I was naked.’
    ‘What had you been wearing?’
    ‘Uniform. When I saw how frightened they were, it made me frightened. I started to run and I was running through bushes. I was being chased by my father-in-law and two orderlies. Eventually they got me cornered and my father-in-law came towards me, waving a big stick. It had a snake wound round it. He was using it as a kind of flail, and the snake was hissing. I backed away, but they got hold of me and tied me up.’
    Rivers detected a slight hesitation. ‘What with?’
    A pause. In determinedly casual tones Anderson said, ‘A pair of lady’s corsets. They fastened them round my arms and tied the laces.’
    ‘Like a strait-waistcoat?’
    ‘Yes.’
    ‘Then?’
    ‘Then I was carted off to some kind of carriage. I was thrown inside and the doors banged shut and it was very dark. Like a grave. The first time I looked it was empty, but then the next time you were there. You were wearing a post-mortem apron and gloves.’
    It was obvious from his tone that he’d finished. Rivers smiled and said, ‘It’s a long time since I’ve worn those.’
    ‘I haven’t recently worn corsets.’
    ‘Whose corsets were they?’
    ‘Just corsets. You want me to say my wife’s, don’t you?’
    Rivers was taken back. ‘I want you to say—’
    ‘Well, I really don’t think they were. I suppose it is possible someone might find being locked up in a loony bin a fairly emasculating experience?’
    ‘I think most people do.’ Though not many said so. ‘I want you to say what you think.’
    No response.
    ‘You say you woke up vomiting?’
    ‘Yes.’
    ‘I wonder why? I mean I can quite see the sight of me in a post-mortem apron might not be to everybody’s taste—’
    ‘I don’t know.’
    ‘What was the most frightening thing about the dream?’
    ‘The snake.’
    A long silence.
    ‘Do you often dream about snakes?’
    ‘Yes.’
    Another long silence. ‘Well, go on, then,’ Anderson exploded at last. ‘That’s what you Freudian Johnnies are on about all the time, isn’t it? Nudity, snakes, corsets. You might at least try to look grateful,