design, but I worked in a bakery as I paid my way through college. Scholarships helped a girl like me, with my colorful background, but I was far from receiving a full ride.
I force the memory of college and those years since out of my mind. Dwelling on the past or what could have been doesn’t help any. Right now, I need to focus on today. Keep my head down and off anyone’s radar. Use cash whenever I possibly can. And never get personal.
As I lie down on the queen-sized bed, I can’t help but think about my run-in with Nate Stevens earlier this morning. He scared the crap out of me. For the first time in months, I felt like I had been found. It’s enough to make me consider moving on a little quicker than usual. I could pack up my measly array of personal belongings, hop into my worn-out Honda, and find another town - on the other side of the country.
But something makes me want to stay. Something pulls deep in my chest like an unwanted need. Maybe not something, but someone. Nate. Stevens.
I sigh as I recall the intensity of his sparkling blue-green eyes. I swear he saw completely through me as he dissected my soul with his deep gaze. But for some strange reason, I want to be dissected by him. I’m not sure if it’s the way he filled out that tight white t-shirt or the way those Levi’s hugged his fine ass, but Nate Stevens definitely made me feel things I haven’t felt before. At least, things I haven’t felt in a long time.
I watch a rerun of Desperate Housewives on late night television and can’t help but wonder what it would be like to settle down. To stop running. To find someone who makes me want to plant roots and spread my wings. Someone who actually wants to give me my dream instead of a nightmare.
As I close my tired eyes, I picture those blue-green eyes that I’ve been seeing all day. Eyes I’ve seen ever since I slammed the pan against his skull. Twice.
For the first time since I ran, I feel content.
Safe.
*****
I’m startled awake from the dark recesses of sleep by another nightmare. They’re always the same.
I feel his warm, angry breath against my skin as he wraps his hands around my neck. He usually avoids touching me in places where the public can see his marks, but tonight, my black sequined gown has a full neck which gives him the perfect cover for his markings.
The air is sucked from my lungs as I struggle to breathe. I feel my feet dangle off the immaculate cherry hardwood floor as his livid, dark eyes bore into me.
“Why must you test my patience so much, Amelia?” he seethes through gritted, pearly white teeth.
I blink back the tears as the fog of the nightmare slowly fades away. My breathing is labored, coming out in short little pants. You’d think I would be used to the never-ending nightmare that was my life, but I’m not. It still affects me like it happened yesterday, not nine months ago.
The alarm clock on the used nightstand reads four a.m. Almost time to get up anyway, so I roll out of bed and step onto the cool hardwood floor. It’s not nearly as nice as the hardwood floors I became accustomed to during my previous life, but these may actually be better. There’s nothing perfect about these floors. They are marked, scarred, and battered. Like me.
I take a hot, relaxing shower as I wash away the sweat from last night’s sleep. I need to be downstairs at the bakery at five to prepare the first batch of dough. The bakery doesn’t open until six-thirty, so it gives me an hour and a half of uninterrupted time to get the day’s products ready to be made.
Yesterday, I didn’t get the bakery opened at six-thirty the way I had planned. After Nate left, Avery went up front and found three customers standing on the sidewalk waiting for the door to open. Oops! I never made it to the front to unlock the door. Avery was cool about the entire thing. Actually, a little too cool, if you ask me. I felt her
I force the memory of college and those years since out of my mind. Dwelling on the past or what could have been doesn’t help any. Right now, I need to focus on today. Keep my head down and off anyone’s radar. Use cash whenever I possibly can. And never get personal.
As I lie down on the queen-sized bed, I can’t help but think about my run-in with Nate Stevens earlier this morning. He scared the crap out of me. For the first time in months, I felt like I had been found. It’s enough to make me consider moving on a little quicker than usual. I could pack up my measly array of personal belongings, hop into my worn-out Honda, and find another town - on the other side of the country.
But something makes me want to stay. Something pulls deep in my chest like an unwanted need. Maybe not something, but someone. Nate. Stevens.
I sigh as I recall the intensity of his sparkling blue-green eyes. I swear he saw completely through me as he dissected my soul with his deep gaze. But for some strange reason, I want to be dissected by him. I’m not sure if it’s the way he filled out that tight white t-shirt or the way those Levi’s hugged his fine ass, but Nate Stevens definitely made me feel things I haven’t felt before. At least, things I haven’t felt in a long time.
I watch a rerun of Desperate Housewives on late night television and can’t help but wonder what it would be like to settle down. To stop running. To find someone who makes me want to plant roots and spread my wings. Someone who actually wants to give me my dream instead of a nightmare.
As I close my tired eyes, I picture those blue-green eyes that I’ve been seeing all day. Eyes I’ve seen ever since I slammed the pan against his skull. Twice.
For the first time since I ran, I feel content.
Safe.
*****
I’m startled awake from the dark recesses of sleep by another nightmare. They’re always the same.
I feel his warm, angry breath against my skin as he wraps his hands around my neck. He usually avoids touching me in places where the public can see his marks, but tonight, my black sequined gown has a full neck which gives him the perfect cover for his markings.
The air is sucked from my lungs as I struggle to breathe. I feel my feet dangle off the immaculate cherry hardwood floor as his livid, dark eyes bore into me.
“Why must you test my patience so much, Amelia?” he seethes through gritted, pearly white teeth.
I blink back the tears as the fog of the nightmare slowly fades away. My breathing is labored, coming out in short little pants. You’d think I would be used to the never-ending nightmare that was my life, but I’m not. It still affects me like it happened yesterday, not nine months ago.
The alarm clock on the used nightstand reads four a.m. Almost time to get up anyway, so I roll out of bed and step onto the cool hardwood floor. It’s not nearly as nice as the hardwood floors I became accustomed to during my previous life, but these may actually be better. There’s nothing perfect about these floors. They are marked, scarred, and battered. Like me.
I take a hot, relaxing shower as I wash away the sweat from last night’s sleep. I need to be downstairs at the bakery at five to prepare the first batch of dough. The bakery doesn’t open until six-thirty, so it gives me an hour and a half of uninterrupted time to get the day’s products ready to be made.
Yesterday, I didn’t get the bakery opened at six-thirty the way I had planned. After Nate left, Avery went up front and found three customers standing on the sidewalk waiting for the door to open. Oops! I never made it to the front to unlock the door. Avery was cool about the entire thing. Actually, a little too cool, if you ask me. I felt her
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