but also bad luck for the living. The Chinese will walk two blocks out of their way not to pass a coffin. Office workers who used the corridor of the Generalâs building had no choice but to pass it. Customers and clients, though, who were mainly Chinese, did have a choice.
From the day the coffin appeared outside Apichartâs office, his business went into a stall, then a nosedive. If his business had been free peanuts, there wouldnât have been a single monkey willing to take one.
Apichart begged, threatened, shed tearsâtears of rage, tears of shame, and most improbably of all, tears of helplessness. The General said the situation was out of his hands, meaning Apichart had had his chance and having crossed the threshold of socially acceptable behavior, heâd lost his right to appeal to the General for help. Apichart was all alone staring down the farang over a coffin that wouldnât be moved. A couple of days later, one of Apichartâs bodyguards delivered the back rent and a yearâs payment in advance. All in cash. He also signed a document saying the earlier money given to the Generalhad been a donation and not a loan. The company that had delivered the coffin had it removed that day. They returned one thousand baht to Ratana, who gave them a tax receipt. She was informed that any time her farang boss or his friends wished to rent a coffin, theyâd be happy to throw in free delivery and give her a 10 percent commission.
Once Colonel Pratt had news of Calvinoâs success in collecting the rent, the Colonel phoned to thank him. Calvinoâs scheme had been crazy but it had worked. Thais rarely fought against anything that proved effective. The Generalâs influence had gradually dissolved over the years except among the community of devout meditators, where his star had never been higher. Like the unwritten rules that governed who was Chinese and who was Thai, each year past retirement at age sixty had washed away another level of power and influence. By age seventy-five, for General Yosaporn, only Colonel Pratt remained his steadfast friend. There were one or two other old-timers, but most of the powerful people he knew were dead. Newspapers sometimes profiled his meditation work. The reality was he was a relic from a time when decency and compassion had value.
As Colonel Pratt sat in Calvinoâs office, holding the bottle of single-malt whiskey, he turned to his old mentor. âI would recommend that Vincent leave town for a few days.â
The General nodded. âMy good friend has a hotel in Pattaya. He can stay there.â
âHold on,â said Calvino. âIâm being exiled to Pattaya?â
âIt will take a few days to clear up the problem,â said Colonel Pratt. âLook at it as a vacation, Vincent. You deserve some time away from the office. Kids, clients â¦â
âTwo fried thugs.â
âRepeat to yourself: I am going on a holiday.â
âDo I have a choice?â
Calvino looked at Colonel Pratt and then at General Yosaporn and saw that he didnât have any choice. Every one had already agreed he had to go away. The problem was that Calvino had been too successful. He hadnât just won the battle with Apichart; he had vanquished him, left him naked and humiliated. Apichart had paid the rent money and signed the letter, but with such a loss of face that some blood would have to be spilled to get it back again. Apichartâs clientswere laughing at him. That was intolerable for a Thai-Chinese. The coffin story had become legendary, whispered between the wives among his circle of friends.
âI could use a holiday,â said Calvino. âA few days away from Bangkok might be a good thing.â
A faint smile crossed the Generalâs lips. âWe hope it will be only a few days.â
Calvino rolled his eyes. âIt could be longer? Iâve got ongoing cases to handle.â
âRemember what I