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I’m just telling you what I know. It
was a first date. I took her to dinner, and she went off the wall
because the waitress spilled a little water on her. She went into
the bathroom to dry off, and when she came back, she told me she
would rather screw than eat. I took her back to my place, and she
was all over me.”
    “My friend, you are in serious trouble. I’ll
give you one last opportunity to tell me the truth.”
    “That is the truth!” Cooper protested.
    Bolan stared at Cooper with an icy, jaundiced
eye. A moment passed while he appeared to consider his next step.
Let me tell you what I know.” He raised his index finger. “First,
her blouse was torn to shreds.”
    “She did that.”
    “She did that, really?”
    “She started to tear it and couldn’t. She
begged me to help her with it.”
    “I suppose that’s when you clawed her
breasts. She has animal-like claw marks on her breasts. As you
might have guessed, her skin was found under your fingernails.”
    “So I scratched her.”
    “You also tore off her panties.”
    “Yes, because she begged me to. I told you,
she was all over me. I never saw a woman so turned on.”
    “They also found GHB pills, a date rape drug
in your apartment.”
    Cooper buried his face in his cuffed hands.
He began breathing deeply and nervously. “Shit.”
    “Do you have any idea how this looks? The
police already questioned the staff at the restaurant, who said
they heard you on the phone, boasting that you were going to screw
this woman’s brains out.”
    Cooper closed his eyes. “This is a total
setup.”
    “Why would she do that? What would motivate
someone you barely know to set you up and accuse you of attempted
rape?”
    “I don’t know.”
    “Have you been drugging women with GHB and
raping them?”
    Cooper hesitated before answering, “No.”
    “You don’t sound convincing.”
    “Whose side are you on?”
    “I ask again, have you been drugging
women?”
    “I did it once, but it was for a friend. He
gave me some pills, and I slipped one of them into a girl’s drink
the other night. I forgot to throw away the rest of the pills.”
    Bolan began writing furiously on his pad.
“Name? I need to know his name?”
    “Yo, the hole is deep enough, I’m not
dragging a friend down with me.”
    “You are going to do time, my naïve friend.
There is physical evidence to corroborate the plaintiff’s
allegations, and you were found with date-rape drugs in your
possession, which you admit you’ve administered before. Christ
himself would have to intervene on your behalf to keep you from
imprisonment.”
    “Isn’t my word worth anything?”
    “Nothing, you stupid, stupid man.”
    “You know what, enough ,” Cooper said
with outrage. “I’ve been tending bar a long time, and believe me,
these young babes are begging for it. They come in and get hammered
night after night hoping to go home with someone. Booze, GHB,
what’s the difference? One’s a little faster than the other, that’s
all. Either way, everyone goes home a winner.”
    “Maintain that attitude, and I have no doubt
that you will spend the next several years of your life in jail,
confined and without freedom. What on earth would compel you to
drug an innocent woman? You willfully aided and abetted in the
commission of felony rape. Shortly thereafter, you were accused of
attempted rape. If the District Attorney puts these facts together
as quickly as I did, you’ll do a minimum of five years. Now give me
your accomplice’s name, while we have the opportunity to construct
a reasonable defense.”
    Cooper began to gasp, and his hands began to
shake. Before he was able to collect himself, his mouth opened, and
he told Bolan his friend’s name.

Six: Toontown
     
    So , do you remember that Roger Rabbit
movie? It was a cool, animated flick. Now do you remember the first
time the PI, Eddie Valiant, crossed the Hollywood border and
entered an animated world, a place called Toontown? Well,