Over My Head (Wildlings) Read Online Free PDF Page A

the best thing about it is the look in his eyes, so close to mine. I get the sense that he's drinking it all in, every moment, so that he'll never forget it.
    I know I won't.
    "That …" I have to clear my throat. "That should work for whoever's watching."
    "Yeah," Chaingang says. "It sure worked for me."
    But then he seems to catch himself. He takes a step back, but one arm stays around my shoulders.
    "We should go," he says.
    His eyes say we shouldn't. His eyes say we should just lie down here together and forget the world. And I want to. Oh, I want to. But wonderful as that kiss was, I know we can't be together. He's a drug dealer and part of a gang. He's been to juvie and his brother runs the Ocean Avers. I don't want any part of that life.
    But if he were to step away from it all …
    I don't let myself go there. You either embrace someone for who they are or you walk away. You don't try to change a person.
    I just wish someone would tell my pulse that.
    "What about your brother?" I ask, trying to think about something other than that amazing kiss. "What's he going to do?"
    "J-Dog doesn't know anything more than me finding Lenny at Tiki Bay."
    "You didn't tell him about the guy?"
    "I can't. None of the Avers know about Lenny and me—that we're Wildlings. And they can't ever know about this guy. J-Dog's pretty much the toughest dude I know, and he's crazy enough to do pretty much anything, but that elder would take him down without even breaking a sweat. It's just us. You and me. We're on our own."
    "We'll figure this out."
    "I know. I knew I could count on you."
    He walks me back to the boardwalk, arm still around my shoulders. I think he's put what happened between us out of his mind, but when we stop at the end of my street, he turns to me.
    "Back there," he says. "That was nice."
    I want to remind him that this is just a role we're playing, except then I'm back on my tiptoes and I give him a quick kiss.
    "Later," I say.
    Before he can react or say anything else, I set off for home at a jog.
    When I get back into bed, I can't sleep. I think about this mysterious cousin and what he wants. I worry about Josh. I try to figure out how I'll sneak off to see Auntie Min.
    But mostly I think about that long kiss at the water line and how good it felt to be in Chaingang's arms.
    Theo, I tell myself.
    From now on I'm going to call him Theo.

    Josh

    I don't get girls. I mean I really don't get them.
    Two weeks ago I had a girlfriend, but even that was complicated. Elzie was perfect. Cute, smart and a Wildling just like me. The first thing she told me was that she didn't want commitments. Then she hung out with me every day, like we were going steady, until she walked out of my life as suddenly as she came into it.
    She did give me a choice: Leave everything I know and go with her into an unspoiled otherworld that only Wildlings can find.
    Or not.
    I know why she stayed over there. That place was everything this world isn't, the way it must have been before people ever showed up. It's what she wants this world to be: no people and none of the crap that people need to survive, like houses and factories and roads and cars. But I have too many people I care about to abandon them all. So I abandoned her instead. I just let her go and came back here.
    I still have no idea if I did the right thing. I know why I did it. I couldn't just walk out on Mom without any explanation. My father already did that, and I'm not going to be the same guy as him. But it's hard. I think about Elzie all the time. I just really really miss her. She was so free spirited and totally embraced her Wildling side. She showed me how to let out the mountain lion in me and appreciate the wild freedom it gave me. I haven't had that experience since I left the otherworld.
    It's especially bad at night when there's nothing else to distract me. At least during the day I've got school to keep me busy, but that has its own pitfalls.

    I don't know why I wasn't expecting