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away.”
    Women like me? Seduce, use, and abuse?
Given the fact that my seduction skills were next to nothing, it
became abundantly clear that he was insane and reasoning with him
was pointless. Had a trick been placed on him? I prayed that Ivan
wasn’t behind this mess. I wasn’t up to fighting another battle
with him. Where was he, anyway? “Bade,” I whispered. “Please help
me. Please.”
    Bade’s response came in the form of a
ghostly discourse that sang through the leaves.
     
     
    Silly Arelia, you’ve been warned
    You’ve been warned to
listen for the music
    Silly, silly, run, run, run
away from this monster
    He’s a monster
    The monster of your
illusions and fears…
     
     
    I watched in disgust as Lucus slashed
himself over and over again as if he were a martyr suffering for
some grand cause.
    “ Run? I can’t run! Look at
Lucus. How can I leave him all alone? I have to go back to the
house and get help. I’ll get Aunt Mae; she’ll know what to
do.”
    The wind grew stronger and it chilled
my bones to their very core.
    “ He has the help you seek, but
only if you’re ready. Only he can introduce you to her. Don’t give
into this delusion. This world is a manifestation of your fears.
You’re afraid that once you find out the truth this is what your
life will become, but have faith that it doesn’t have to be this
way. Don’t be afraid of the truth. The truth may be ugly and
painful. It may make you uncomfortable and shatter your illusions
about yourself and the world around you. It may force you to
re-evaluate your relationships with everyone and everything, but
you cannot hide from it. The truth is the truth. Run towards the
music, silly one! Help is waiting where the music is! The truth is
waiting and it shall set you free.”
    “ Really! That’s all you’ve
got? The truth shall set me free? Bade, that’s a
cliché!”
    “ Run towards the music!”
Bade insisted. “Run away from the swamp and the graves.”
    How could I simply leave Lucus all alone?
In one last desperate attempt I tried to snatch the glass from his
hand. My attempt was futile, considering he had a clear height
advantage over me.
    “ Don’t you dare try to
stop me,” he said.
    I couldn’t bring myself to look at his
bloody chest. The sensation of his warm blood as it dripped onto my
feet was revolting. I closed my eyes and pressed my body against
his, hoping that my embrace would somehow magically close up all of
his wounds and rid him of his grief. “I love you, Lucus. I’m going
to make things right, just you wait. Everything is going to be
alright.” I tried to sound as convincing as possible even though a
million fearful thoughts were buzzing through my head.
    I felt a glimpse of the old
Lucus fighting his way back to me. He enveloped me in his arms and
softly ran his fingers through my tangled hair. I held my breath
and prayed to all the saints in New Orleans that he was no longer
crazy. There was an agonizing moment of silence before he spoke.
His voice was pained and mournful. “I can’t stop loving you despite
all that you’ve done to me. Your mere presence has the power to
send me to the bottomless pit of hell and straight up to the
infinite glory of heaven. You’re my everything, and I will love you
forever and always even though you don’t feel the same about
me. Je
t’aime. Je t’adore, Arelia.”
    I fought back tears. He was so dramatic.
So tortured. So insanely perfect and unaware of the profound impact
he had on every inch of my body and soul. Heaven forfend! What had
I turned into? “You’re wrong. I do love you and I’m going to prove
it to you, but right now I have to leave you. I promise I’ll be
back. I promise.” I kissed him deeply, passionately, and with all
the strength I could muster, before he pushed me away and continued
his self-inflicted torture.
    I turned my back on him. Bittersweet.
Always bittersweet. Why couldn’t it ever just be sweet?
    I let out a low sigh, focused on