Older and Wilder: A Steamy Gay MM Romance Read Online Free PDF Page B

floor?”
     
                  Jesse tried to lighten the mood and forced a smile. “Can you behave if I let you sleep in my bed?”
     
                  “Do you want me to?”
     
                  The flush crept over Jesse's skin and he looked away then crawled into bed without answering.  Derek slipped under the covers next to him, as close to his edge of the bed as he could be without falling out. Snuffing the light didn’t make it easier to rest.
     
                  Jesse tossed and turned, seeking a comfortable position, a cool spot in the bed, and the stilling of his mind, but sleep eluded him.  He turned over and then turned again, a full three sixty roll and heard a soft chuckle beside him.
     
                  “What?” he  demanded.
     
                  “You'll never get to sleep if you don’t stop moving.”
     
                  Jesse concentrated on making his body still, inviting in sleep, but the minutes continued to stretch out ahead of him road trip down like a highway of wasted time and frustration.
     
                  Derek rolled onto his side to face his, his face barely illuminated by moonlight that peeked through the curtains, and asked, “You need a back rub or something?”
     
                  “Or something, I guess.  Answers.  What’s in Colorado?”
     
                  “I’m buying a guest ranch.”
     
                  “A what?’”
     
                  “They used to call it a dude ranch.  Now it’s a guest ranch.  It’s a hotel with horses.  Take people out to play cowboy during the day and let them soak in the hot tub at night.”
     
                  “So not at all like real cowboys?”
     
                  “Not even a little bit.”
     
                  “You’re done with the rodeo?”
     
                  “I’m ready to have a home.  I still get to ride and be around people.  I think I can make a living doing this.”
     
                  Jesse’s suspicious side kicked into high gear.  “If it makes money why are they selling?”
     
                  “Owner died.  His son lives in Chicago and just wants it gone.  It earns enough to live on if you’re working it but not enough to pay someone else to do it.”
     
                  “So what’s your plan?”
     
                  “Do what your dad managed to do right out of high school.  Make a life.”
     
                  “He had mom and a baby on the way.” 
     
                  Jesse felt the slight vibration of the mattress beneath him as Derek chuckled.  “I didn't say it was his idea.  I said he did it.  Built a sustainable life. He wakes up in the morning and smiles.  I wake up in the morning and I all I feel is an ache in every bone I’ve ever broken, and I’ve broken most of them at least once.”
     
                  “It’s too late to change that.”
     
                  “It’s not too late to stop breaking them.  I’m going to learn to garden.”
     
                  The laugh bubbled from within him, pushing its way past restraint and ignoring the late hour.  “Garden? You’re going to garden?”
     
                  Derek huffed a quick, harsh laugh along with him.  “Probably not. I doubt I’ll ever learn the secrets of tomatoes.  But I could find someone who doesn't mind living with me who likes playing in the dirt.”
     
                  The knot in Jesse's stomach, the one that had kept him up so long, twisted.  Derek was looking for someone, but it wasn’t him.  “I hope you find someone.”
     
                  “You don’t like dirt?”
     
                  “Not really.”
     
                  “But you do