âHas she opened her eyes yet?â Secret asked the nurse.
âOne or twice,â the nurse said.
Secret swallowed hard as a horrible thought flushed through her mind. The baby clearly had that Miller nose and Secretâs lips. But what if . . . what if she had eyes like the man who helped make her? Secret would know his eyes anywhere. She knew them that day she ran into him outside of the Chinese restaurant at the strip mall. Heâd stopped to open the door for her. He hadnât recognized her eyes at all. Good thing, because next he probably would have noticed her belly and possibly done the math. But what would he care? He was just some pervert who had paid to sleep with another manâs daughter. Secret didnât take any chances though. She hustled away from that restaurant quick, fast, and in a hurry.
Her baby daddy and that whole night with him was something that Secret had long pushed to the back of her mind. Something she wanted to forget forever. But if this baby had eyes like his, sheâd forever be reminded of him, of that night.
âLet me see,â the nurse said. She eyeballed Secret, examining her face. âYep, she has eyes just like yours.â The nurse smiled. âShe is your mini me all day long.â
Secret smiled, and cried, and thanked God in her head.
âI just want to hold her so bad.â Secret wriggled her hands hoping she could reach just a part of her baby.
The nurse positioned the baby so that her tiny head was by Secretâs hand. Secret stroked her head full of black straight hair.
âYou have to smell her,â the nurse said, lifting the baby to Secretâs face. âThere is nothing in the world like the smell of a baby, until they get bigger of course. Then you canât tell their stanky little behinds from the family pet.â
Both the nurse and Secret let out a chuckle. This was the first time Secret had laughed since she could remember.
Secret put her nose to her babyâs cheek and inhaled. âBaby lotion,â she said. Her nostrils were filled with the smell of that pink baby lotion. She closed her eyes and inhaled another lovely whiff of her little one.
The nurse watched the longing on Secretâs face to just cup her baby in her arms and pull her into the safety of her bosom. âWhere are they with the key to unlock these handcuffs?â she mumbled. âI donât see why the officer out there canât do it. Heâs the one who put them on.â
âMs. Miller, congratulations on the birth of your new baby.â
Secretâs eyes opened at the sound of the deep male voice booming through the room. It caught Secret and the nurse off guard and startled the poor baby out of her sleep.
The nurse pulled the now whining baby to her chest.
Secretâs eyes followed. âIs she okay?â She panicked at the sound of hearing her baby cry. She felt like a bad and useless mother not being able to take the baby in her arms to comfort her, to let her know that everything was going to be okay. Thatâs what mothers were supposed to do, even though thatâs not what Yolanda had done when she found out Secret was young and pregnant and needed all the help she could get to raise the baby. But Secret was not her mother. She was going to be a better mother, the best mother she could be. But how could she do it in handcuffs? This motherhood thing was already off to a bad start in more ways than one.
The man, dressed in black slacks, a white dress shirt with a tie, and shiny black shoes, looked to the nurse. âCan you excuse myself and the patient please?â He pulled out a badge and flashed it. âPolice business.â
This must have been who they were waiting for to remove the cuffs from Secret. âPlease take these things off,â Secret pleaded with the officer.
âI will.â He paused for a second. âBut like I just told the nurse here, I need to speak with you