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still, I can’t tell how she’s feeling. Is she mad at me? Is she changing her mind?
    “It’s the right thing,” I say.
    “Okay.”
    “You’ll be glad you did it.”
    “I guess.”
    “You still want to, right?”
    “Sure, sure. Look, I cant really talk now. There are people around. Plus, I have to finish the social studies report and clean the mess in my room. And my dad needs me to fax him some papers. So we’ll talk later, OK?”
    “OK. See you.”
    “’Bye.”
    She’s incredible, Nbook. So hard-working. And so good at everything—piano, singing, poetry, schoolwork, song writing. She’s a good person. A good friend. A good daughter and sister.
    But you know what the problem is? She’s not perfect. And that bothers her.
    I’ve been trying to tell her she’s great just the way she is. So has Dawn.
    But she’s so lost on her own feelings. I don’t thinks she really hears.
    Which is exactly why she needs a pro. Someone who’s trained to listen and say the right thing.
    I hope Dr. Fuentes is all she’s cracked up to be.
    Wed. 9/30
    Homeroom
    Way cool.
    I am totally blown away.
    The Homecoming Bash posters are up. Already.
    When did Christina do this? After school yesterday, I geuss.
    The girl does NOT let grass grow under her feet.
    Nbook, they’re gorgeous. And Vanish’s name is splashed across the bottom, in HUGE letters like this:
    022
    This morning, in the lobby, everyone’s gathering around it. Rico is going nuts.
    Bruce and Patti are trying to be cool about it, but I can tell they’re thrilled. Even Maggie had a smile on her face.
    I am so PROUD.
    I mean, just yesterday we’re this garage band, Nbook. Playing music for fun.
    Hanging out. Nobody to hear us bu ourselves.
    Then comes the battle fo the Bands. And now we’re this. We’re pros!
    What next? THE SKY’S THE LIMIT!
    023
    Soc. Stud.
    I visit the poster again after homeroom.
    Maggie’s there too. We gush. Kids are passing by, saying they’re happy that Vanish is playing. All very good for the ego.
    Ten Maggie’s mile goes a slow fade.
    From behind me, I hear Justin’s voice saying, “Hey, cool” or something.
    He’s nodding.
    I nod.
    Maggie nods.
    We look like strange tropical birds in the zoo.
    After some small talk, we all go off the class.
    I have a hunch, Nbook.
    He still likes her. She still likes him.
    But something’s off. They need to work it out.
    Maybe Dr. Fuentes does couples therapy.
    Math
    Today at lunch Maggie’s even more usual than usual.
    She’s having second thoughts. About Dr. Fuentes.
    “Are you sure this is a good idea?” she asks.
    I repeat what Mami has said about Dr. Fuentes.
    “But what if it’s not that big a problem?” Maggie asks. “What if I can solve it myself? If I go to the therapist, I might be making the whole thing bigger than it is. And then it would take longer to get over it.”
    “Well, uh...” What can I say, Nbook? I know she needs this. But I don’t want to force her to do something she’s not ready for.
    “I’m sure you’ll make the right decision,” Dawn says.
    Thank you, Dawn.
    She’s absolutely right.
    Maggie needs to decide, not me.
    She better decide right.
    If she cancel, I don’t know what I’ll do.
    Science
    After math, just outside of class, Cece pulls me aside and asks what’s the matter.
    She says I’m looking depressed.
    We started walking. I began to tell her what’s happening—without mentioning Maggie’s name.
    Then she elbows me in the ribs. Just because Brendan s heading toward us.
    He says hi. I say hi,
    He falls into step with us.
    I reach into my pocket. I pull out the copy of the Vanish rehearsal tape I made last night, and give it to him.
    He lights up. “Cool. I’ll give it back tomorrow.”
    “It’s yours,” I say.
    “Thanks.”
    He’s genuinely excited.
    Cece’s raising her eyebrows. “A gift,” she said meaningfully.
    Brendan and I politely ignored her. We walk music.
    Then I see HIM.
    James the unruly.
    He’s standing against