Nothing But Blue Read Online Free PDF Page B

opening.”
    â€œAn art opening?” She was trying to sound casual, but she couldn’t hide her excitement. “That sounds like fun. Who with?”
    I sighed. She wanted so badly for me to be normal, to have a group of friends, to be all social and upbeat. Like she was. It was sweet in a way, but it wasn’t me.
    â€œSome kids from school,” I said. I didn’t want to tell her it was a date. I especially didn’t want to tell her it was Jake. She’d never liked Jake. She wouldn’t understand that he had changed. It was easier to let her think what she wanted to think.
    And she did. She clasped her hands. “Oh, honey, I’m so glad. See? High school’s not so bad after all. But are you sure that’s the right thing to wear? Can I just fix your hair a bit?”
    â€œI’ve got to go. I’ll be late.”
    â€œRight, right. You go and have fun. Go out after if you want with the group. Just don’t eat too much, okay? It’s not ladylike to eat in front of others, and you don’t want to get fat.”
    My mother was a social magnet. But she wasn’t big on dating—she thought a group was better. “Gives you a chance to be friends with girls and boys,” she had told me numerous times. “Then if you meet someone who might be something more, you’ll know them as friends first. That’s the best way. You’re not ready to get too attached to just one person at your age.”
    She was wrong about that. I was totally ready to get attached to just one person.

N OW
    I wake to the smell of doughnuts. Fresh, warm, scrumptious doughnuts. There are sounds of a town waking up. Delivery trucks. Doors being unlocked. A few good-mornings are called out. The sun stretches through the window and lights up my sleeping spot in the old theater. I couldn’t see much last night in the dark and was too tired even to take out my flashlight. I just crawled to a corner and stayed there.
    But now I can see that the ceiling beams are full of cobwebs and spiders. Some very large and creepy. Not too far from where I’d slept, the floorboard is so rotted that a hole has eaten through it. It’s amazing I didn’t fall through.
    I stand carefully and stretch. I run my hands through my hair in an attempt to comb it. I don’t know why, because it’s not like there’s anything I can do about it anyway, nor is there anyone to care. Still, I don’t want to draw attention to myself by looking like a ratty homeless girl. I lift my arms and sniff. I stink. Not much I can do about that, either.
    I ease myself down the fire escape and back into the world for another day.
    I find myself standing in front of one of the bakeries with my nose in the air. I remind myself of the dog, and wonder where he came from and where he’s gone to now.
    â€œExcuse me,” says a woman from behind me. “I’m just opening.” She is large, with a wide roll of fat under her chin, the kind of woman you might expect to work in a bakery. She wears a hairnet, and a red and white striped apron peeks out from under her blue jacket, making her look like an American flag.
    She jiggles the lock and holds the door open. “You coming in?” She glances at something near my legs. “No dogs, though. He has to stay out.”
    I spin around and there he is. The dog. I feel a slight twinge of relief at seeing him again. I’m about to explain that he isn’t my dog, but instead I shake my head and tell the woman I’m leaving.
    She shrugs. “Suit yourself. Our doughnuts are the best. The baker’s just about to take out a fresh batch, if you change your mind.”
    I walk to the end of the block and think of how I can get some food. The dog follows about ten paces behind. I watch the woman put a sign on the sidewalk that announces HOT COFFEE/FRESH DOUGHNUTS
.
I can almost taste those doughnuts. Even the dog licks his lips. The