Not Looking For Love: Episode 1 Read Online Free PDF

does it that way, guys especially, so why can't I? And Scott seems like the kind of guy who would fuck a girl with no strings attached, no problem. If his drawing proves anything, it's that he's into me too. Why else would he rush out here after work, just so he could draw it so quickly?  
    He glances down at my bare feet. "Aren't you cold?"
    I smile and turn to face him, hoping my eyes are seductive now, not haunted and sad.
    "Not really," I say and do what I wanted to do since this morning. I twist and move my leg so it's pressing against his thigh. His arm tenses as I run my hand down his biceps, feeling the cords, the dips and valleys. He's staring at me like he can't really believe I just touched him, but his eyes are soft now, and his breaths shallow. I could go further, nothing's stopping me. So I do.
    His breath hitches as my hand slides across the bare skin of his neck, along the taut muscle. He's still not stopping me, so I keep going, tracing the line of his collarbone to the soft spot where it ends. My tongue should really be making this journey, and I bite down softly on my lower lip. I slide my hand down the center of his chest, which is as hard as his arm and his neck. Damn, why does he have to be wearing two shirts?  
    My fingers brush against his nipples, and I squeeze. He gasps and pulls away, but he's staring at me like he just might eat me. His parted lips are glistening as wet as the sea.  
    My hand travels down his stomach, over the dips and hills, along the center ridge. I'm breathing hard now in anticipation. But he grabs my hand and pulls it away before I reach my final destination.  
    "What?" I ask. His eyes and his wet lips are saying yes, his hard breathing is saying yes, so why is he stopping me?
    "You're moving real fast," he says, still staring at me and still holding my hand. His eyes are sad now. Like mine were in his drawing. And I don't want to see any sadness.
    "Is there something wrong with that?" I ask and force my mouth not to pout.  
    "Are you for real?" he says and barks a laugh. "I feel like I'm in a dream or something, and you want to keep going?"
    He's holding my hand loosely but firmly like he's afraid I'll touch him some more if he lets go.
      I lick my lips and smile. "I do."
    "Wow." He shakes his head like he doesn't believe me. "I know some fast girls, but none of them has ever come on this strong before."
    He's mocking me; I know it. But why doesn't he just get up and walk away then? Why is he still holding my hand, staring at me like he doesn't think I'm really there?
    The winds are blowing in ceaseless gusts all around us, stirring the embers of hope in my chest. Maybe today, the wind will blow everything away, and tomorrow all will be well. I feel like we're the only two people in the whole world, like there's nothing beyond the wind, nothing beyond the sea. Like neither of my parents will ever die. I'm not planning it; it just happens.  
    I lean forward crushing our two hands between us and kiss him. The warmth that's been coiling around itself inside my body finally has an outlet. It rushes out and engulfs us. His lips taste salty, but there's a sweetness there too, something I can't name, can't describe. For all the hardness of his muscles, his lips are soft. He lets me kiss him, and kisses me back. I run my tongue against his teeth and feel his hot breath against my wet lips. I push my tongue through the gap between his teeth and try to find his.  
    He grabs my shoulder and pushes me back, moving his head away, his stubble brushing against my cheek. I lean forward, wanting more, but he's holding me at arm's length now and won't let me near.  
    A blinding light follows a crack of thunder almost immediately. I shiver, belatedly realizing the whole pier is actually shaking. I don't care. Nothing can touch us up here. It's only the two of us. And all I want is for Scott to pin me down against the wooden planks and have his way with me.
    "I should go," he says