Naughty Nine Tales of Christmas Crime Read Online Free PDF Page B

have any excuse to hang around, so I went to the restroom and used my regular stall—I felt like I could start having mail delivered there—and changed out of my elfwear. I tried to polish off another chapter of my book, but Big Buck's evil grin kept muscling the words out of my head. After rereading the same paragraph for the fifth time, I threw the paperback into my shoulder bag and stood up. It was Mission: Impossible time.
    When I got back to Santa's Workshop, Kev and Big Buck were finally gone. There were still plenty of shoppers around—the mall would be open for another hour—so I did a slow circuit around the Workshop, pretending to window shop at some of the crapeterias nearby: Big Lots and Lady Bug and Monkeyberry Toys. Once I was sure no one was watching me, I hopped over the faux-velvet rope, hurried up the path to Santa's throne and fished around underneath for the tape recorder.
    It was still there. I quickly stuffed it in my bag and motored, congratulating myself on my nerve as I scurried to the nearest exit and headed out to the parking lot.
    But then I heard something that knocked the nerve (and scared the bejesus) right out of me.
    "Well, hello there."
    Yeah, I know. It's not exactly "Caught you, you sneaky bitch" or "Die! Die! Die!" followed by the sound of gunfire. But hey—it was Big Buck's voice, and that was bloodcurdling enough.
    I turned to find a burly, fifty-ish man in a green parka lurking in the shadows just beyond the doors. His beard was gone, replaced by a stubby cigarette that jutted from his curled lips, and he wasn't wearing his red and white suit. But there was no mistaking that smarmy voice and those bright, smirking eyes.
    I stopped and caught my breath. The cold air stung my lungs.
    "Geez, Buck. You scared me."
    "Scared you?" He seemed to like that. "You ain't frightened of ol' Buck, are you?"
    I chirped out a little chuckle as fake as a plastic snowman.
    "No, no, of course not. But, you know, some guy's behind you in the dark . . .? It's creepy."
    Big Buck nodded.
    "Sure, I understand. That's why I'm here, actually. I thought somebody oughta walk you to your car."
    I tried to do a quick look around without being too obvious about it. It was late, but there were still shoppers coming and going. Big Buck wouldn't try something in public . . . would he?
    "Oh, you don't have to worry about me," I said. "I know ka-rah-tay."
    I put up my hands and did a little hiii-yah! .
    Big Buck laughed and copied the gesture.
    "Really? That's great. Cuz I know karate, too. Maybe you and I should go at it sometime."
    Forget scary. Now things were getting gross .
    I couldn't handle it anymore. I turned and stalked off.
    "Yeah, well, gotta go, bye."
    "Hey, hold on!" Big Buck called after me. He sounded genuinely surprised.
    I didn't stop.
    "Hold on!"
    Chubby, clutching fingers grabbed hold of my upper arm.
    I whirled around, tearing myself out of Big Buck's grip.
    "Do you want me to scream? Cuz I will, I swear to God!"
    Big Buck took a step back, hands up.
    "O.K., O.K., don't touch the merchandise. I get it."
    His thick lips bent into a sneering grin that pushed his cigarette up so high I almost thought it was going to set his nose hair on fire.
    "I won't follow you if you don't want my protection. I'll just watch you from right here."
    "Fine," I said, though of course, it wasn't. It was really, really freaky.
    I looked back once when I was half-way to my car, and Big Buck was still there, watching me. I checked again in the rear-view mirror as I drove away, and there he was. Waving. I was a couple blocks away when it hit me.
    Now he knows what my car looks like .
    Or maybe he'd known already. He'd been waiting for me at the right exit. Had he been spying on me? Or was it all just a coincidence? Maybe he was having a smoke and out I came and he decided to have a little fun.
    Or maybe the fun was going to come later . . . .
    I watched the cars behind me, wondering if I was being followed. I didn't see