Nantucket Red (Nantucket Blue) Read Online Free PDF Page A
Author: Leila Howland
crowd. “Tell me not—” I began.
That’s when I saw Zack take the empty seat next to his dad. He was taller, bigger, further along the road from boy to man. What had been the beginning of a transformation at Christmas was now complete. He was no longer a dorky-but-hot-to-me sophomore. In his Nantucket Reds and a white button-down, with the sleeves rolled up, he was flat-out gorgeous. My mouth went dry. I had to start again. “Tell me not, in mournful numbers, ‘Life is but an empty dream!’ For the soul is dead that slumbers,” I continued, clutching my index card. “And things are not what they seem.”
I think something happens after you’ve been in love with someone, and especially if you’ve had sex, because I had a GPS on Zack as my parents asked me to pose for various pictures near the beech tree. Even when I was facing away, smiling at the camera, I was aware of his presence. He was over by the lemonade. He was texting. He was laughing at something Jules said. Where were his glasses, I wondered? Did he get contacts?
“Okay girls,” Mom said, gesturing to Jules. “Let’s get the two of you.”
Jules and I put our arms around each other, though not as tight as we once would have. We tilted our heads toward each other. I could feel that we were both holding our breath as my mom and Mr. Clayton snapped pictures. Then Mr. Clayton stepped forward and handed Jules a package wrapped in white tissue paper and a single blue ribbon.
“This is for you,” Jules said, handing the package to me.
“Oh,” I said, taking the gift. “Thank you.”
“It’s from all of us,” Mr. Clayton added, smiling, throwing an arm around Zack.
I unwrapped the tissue paper and gasped. It was a picture, in a simple, wooden frame, of Nina on her graduation day from Brown. I’d seen the picture many times. It had sat on Nina’s dresser for as long as I could remember. Nina was in her graduation gown. Her cap was off and her hair was long and flowing. She was looking right at the camera, daring me to do something great. I held the picture to my chest. “Thank you.”
“Let me see,” Mom said, taking it. “Aw,” she cooed, as if it were a picture of a cute puppy. I snatched it back.
“Are you sure I can have this?” I asked. It was such a part of their home I felt like I was walking away with their chimney or the stained glass window in the dining room.
“She loved you, Cricket,” Mr. Clayton said. For the first time I noticed how much he’d aged this year. “And she loved Brown. She would’ve been so happy you were going there.”
I looked at Jules. A shade of hesitation passed over her face before she smiled and said, “Hey, it’s not like I was going to get in.”
“Thank you,” I said, hugging Jules with all of my might. I took a step toward Zack, about to hug him, too, when he held up his hand.
“Hey, Cricket. Give me five.”
Honestly, it would have been better if he’d told me to fuck off.
I held up a hand, not sure if I was going to give him five or slap him. Jules took my hand and spun me around, a residual friend instinct kicking in. “There’s a party tonight at Jay’s house,” she said as she dipped me. “Pick you up at eight.”
Seven
“ WOULD YOU LIKE SOME DISGUSTING CAKE , my lady?” Alexi asked, his cowlick pointed north and his lip curled in repulsion. Polly had given Alexi the job of waiter to keep him busy at my graduation barbecue.
“Alexi, that’s not very nice,” Polly said. “Kate made that cake for Cricket.”
“Sorry, Kate,” Alexi said, aware he’d socially misfired, something he was working very hard not to do.
“It’s okay,” Mom said, tousling his hair. She stage-whispered, “Carrot cake is Cricket’s favorite, but I don’t really like it either. Who wants vegetables in their cake?” She made a face, and Alexi laughed like this was the funniest thing he’d heard all year.
This was a huge improvement from how this evening had started. I didn’t
That’s when I saw Zack take the empty seat next to his dad. He was taller, bigger, further along the road from boy to man. What had been the beginning of a transformation at Christmas was now complete. He was no longer a dorky-but-hot-to-me sophomore. In his Nantucket Reds and a white button-down, with the sleeves rolled up, he was flat-out gorgeous. My mouth went dry. I had to start again. “Tell me not, in mournful numbers, ‘Life is but an empty dream!’ For the soul is dead that slumbers,” I continued, clutching my index card. “And things are not what they seem.”
I think something happens after you’ve been in love with someone, and especially if you’ve had sex, because I had a GPS on Zack as my parents asked me to pose for various pictures near the beech tree. Even when I was facing away, smiling at the camera, I was aware of his presence. He was over by the lemonade. He was texting. He was laughing at something Jules said. Where were his glasses, I wondered? Did he get contacts?
“Okay girls,” Mom said, gesturing to Jules. “Let’s get the two of you.”
Jules and I put our arms around each other, though not as tight as we once would have. We tilted our heads toward each other. I could feel that we were both holding our breath as my mom and Mr. Clayton snapped pictures. Then Mr. Clayton stepped forward and handed Jules a package wrapped in white tissue paper and a single blue ribbon.
“This is for you,” Jules said, handing the package to me.
“Oh,” I said, taking the gift. “Thank you.”
“It’s from all of us,” Mr. Clayton added, smiling, throwing an arm around Zack.
I unwrapped the tissue paper and gasped. It was a picture, in a simple, wooden frame, of Nina on her graduation day from Brown. I’d seen the picture many times. It had sat on Nina’s dresser for as long as I could remember. Nina was in her graduation gown. Her cap was off and her hair was long and flowing. She was looking right at the camera, daring me to do something great. I held the picture to my chest. “Thank you.”
“Let me see,” Mom said, taking it. “Aw,” she cooed, as if it were a picture of a cute puppy. I snatched it back.
“Are you sure I can have this?” I asked. It was such a part of their home I felt like I was walking away with their chimney or the stained glass window in the dining room.
“She loved you, Cricket,” Mr. Clayton said. For the first time I noticed how much he’d aged this year. “And she loved Brown. She would’ve been so happy you were going there.”
I looked at Jules. A shade of hesitation passed over her face before she smiled and said, “Hey, it’s not like I was going to get in.”
“Thank you,” I said, hugging Jules with all of my might. I took a step toward Zack, about to hug him, too, when he held up his hand.
“Hey, Cricket. Give me five.”
Honestly, it would have been better if he’d told me to fuck off.
I held up a hand, not sure if I was going to give him five or slap him. Jules took my hand and spun me around, a residual friend instinct kicking in. “There’s a party tonight at Jay’s house,” she said as she dipped me. “Pick you up at eight.”
Seven
“ WOULD YOU LIKE SOME DISGUSTING CAKE , my lady?” Alexi asked, his cowlick pointed north and his lip curled in repulsion. Polly had given Alexi the job of waiter to keep him busy at my graduation barbecue.
“Alexi, that’s not very nice,” Polly said. “Kate made that cake for Cricket.”
“Sorry, Kate,” Alexi said, aware he’d socially misfired, something he was working very hard not to do.
“It’s okay,” Mom said, tousling his hair. She stage-whispered, “Carrot cake is Cricket’s favorite, but I don’t really like it either. Who wants vegetables in their cake?” She made a face, and Alexi laughed like this was the funniest thing he’d heard all year.
This was a huge improvement from how this evening had started. I didn’t