Mysteries According to Humphrey Read Online Free PDF

a mystery to me.
    My friends take very good care of me.

    At the end of the day, Helpful-Holly raised her hand again. “We need our homework assignment,” she said.
    A lot of the other students tried to shush her, but Holly was determined. “Mrs. Brisbane always gives us homework.”
    Mr. E. replied that he had a big surprise for the class: the only homework assignment was to bring in a riddle or joke for the next day.
    â€œYou don’t even have to write it down,” he said. Then he tapped his finger on the side of his head. “Just remember it up here.”
    It was a pretty strange homework assignment. But then, it had been a pretty strange day.
    When the bell rang, my friends all looked happy as they left the class.
    â€œBye, Mr. E.!” Thomas said on his way out of class. “See you tomorrow.”
    â€œBye, Mo-Momas,” Mr. E. said. I thought he was mixed up until I remembered the name song.
    I heard Hurry-Up-Harry tell Slow-Down-Simon, “Pretty sweet—no homework.”
    â€œMr. E. is a great teacher!” Simon said.
    â€œHe’s so funny!” Kelsey told Rosie.
    After the students had left, Mr. E. sighed a big sigh and said, “That went well.” He strolled over to the table by the window where Og and I live. “I think they liked me.”
    â€œYES-YES-YES,” I shouted. “And they like Mrs. Brisbane, too.”
    Of course, all he heard was “SQUEAK-SQUEAK-SQUEAK.”
    Mr. Morales came into the room. “I’m glad I caught you, Ed,” he said. “Are you available to teach tomorrow?”
    Mr. E. said yes, and then the principal said, “I wasn’t able to talk to Mrs. Brisbane, but her husband said her lesson plans are in the desk.”
    â€œYes, I know,” Mr. E. said.
    â€œGood!” Mr. Morales said. “I’ll see you tomorrow.”
    The two men shook hands and Mr. Morales left.
    When the door closed, Mr. E. chuckled. “That’s good news for me.”
    Then he opened Mrs. Brisbane’s desk drawer and took out the binder with the lesson plans in it.
    Whew! He was finally thinking about teaching his students. I watched him as he turned the pages.
    â€œMath problems, vocabulary, art project, science—wow, she really packs a lot in,” he said aloud.
    â€œYES-YES-YES!” I agreed.
    â€œI don’t know about all this,” he said. He turned another page. “And that’s not going to work.”
    Og started splashing around in his tank. I was worried, too. After all, these were Mrs. Brisbane’s lesson plans. And Mr. E. didn’t seem to like them.
    Mr. E. closed the binder. “I’m going to have to make these subjects a lot more fun to make this work,” he said. “A
lot
more fun.”
    He was still muttering under his breath when he picked up his big bag and left Room 26.
    I had no idea what he was muttering about.
    And I still had no idea what had happened to Mrs. Brisbane.
    But I had a BAD-BAD-BAD feeling that it wasn’t something good.
    Â 
    HUMPHREY’S DETECTIONARY: A detective without any clues is like a classroom without a real teacher!

4
    The Case of the Curious Clues

    O nce the room was quiet, I hopped on my wheel and spun as fast as my legs would go. Spinning helps me think, and I had a lot of thinking to do.
    I waited and waited for Aldo to come in and clean. Maybe he would tell me what had happened.
    Suddenly, I was blinded and Aldo’s voice boomed, “Hey, buddies, how’s it going?”
    â€œThings are unsqueakably bad!” I told him as my eyes adjusted to the lights.
    Aldo wheeled his cleaning cart into Room 26 and toward our table. “I guess you heard about Mrs. Brisbane,” he said, leaning down to look in my cage.
    â€œWHAT-WHAT-WHAT happened?” I screeched.
    Aldo shook his head. “Who’d have thought? I don’t have to tell you what I think of Mrs. Brisbane. She inspired me to want