Mr Gum and the Biscuit Billionaire Read Online Free PDF

and had tattoos on their wings.

    Altogether it was a frightful scene, made even worse by the rain and the dark thundery skies above but Polly had work to do. She peered over the cliff edge and could just make out two tiny figures on the beach below, striking evil poses.
    â€˜Those flippin’ roo-de-lallies!’ she muttered and without further thought she started down the cliff.
    Down on the rocks Mr Gum was looking out to sea with a powerful telescope he’d made froma jar of mustard, a rolled-up magazine and a powerful telescope.
    â€˜There he is!’ he shouted gleefully as a small wooden fishing boat appeared on the horizon. ‘It’s Monsieur Bellybutton!’
    â€˜Are you sure?’ asked Billy William, but at that moment the wind changed direction and the most horrendous stench came to their noses. It smelt like a zoo had married a gigantic fart. Only it was even worse than that.
    â€˜Oh, yes,’ said Mr Gum, his eyebrows curling up and turning crispy with the pong. ‘It’s him all right!’
    â€˜Bonjour Monsieur Gum, bonjour Monsieur Billy!’ shouted Bellybutton as he rowed into Smuggler’s Cove.
    You know in cartoons when they do wavy lines to show that something smells bad? Like there’ll be a rotten fish head or something and they’ll do wavy lines coming off of it? Well, I’m not lying but Monsieur Bellybutton actually had those wavy lines coming off of him IN REAL LIFE. He had never once taken a bath and he was quite an old man so just think about it.
    â€˜Bonjour,’ the two villains cried in pleasure. You see, incredible as it was, they actually
liked
the smell of Monsieur Bellybutton.
    â€˜Mmm,’ said Mr Gum, inhaling long and hard. ‘He’s smellin’ even riper than last year. Lovely!’

    Polly was nearly at the bottom of the cliff when the smell of Bellybutton hit her like invisible boxing gloves filled with gorgonzola. She fell to her knees, clutching her nose in agony, but even so the smell found a way in, bringing tears to her eyes and clouding her thoughts.
    â€˜I dunno what that’s about,’ said Polly through gritted teeth. ‘But them robbers needs sortin’ out!’

    Determinedly she stuffed a bunch of daisies up her nostrils and continued on. The further down she climbed, the stronger the smell became. The daisies shrivelled up and went brown. Seagulls fell out of the sky, landing with thumps all around her, but still she did not falter. And that’s what Pollyness is all about.
    Finally she reached the bottom of the cliff. The wind changed direction once more and she could breathe again, which is very helpful for living.
    And now she saw where the stink was coming from. A smellster Frenchman with wavy lines coming off of him IN REAL LIFE washelping Mr Gum into a mucky fishing boat encrusted with barnacles. Billy William was already on board, the biscuit tin clutched to his scrawny chest.
    â€˜Hey! Robbers!’ shouted Polly. ‘I’m arrestin’ you in the name of the Laws!’
    â€˜ You! ’ spat Mr Gum, spinning round in fury. ‘How’d you find us, you meddler? We never left no tracks to follow!’
    But even as he spoke, a tenner flew into the air and Mr Gum knew the truth of Billy William’s laziness at putting lids on biscuit tins properly.
    â€˜You MUNCHER!’ shouted Mr Gum,slapping the careless butcher round the chops. ‘I TOLD you to sort out that lid!’
    â€˜Robbers, your games is up,’ said Pollysternly. ‘An’ don’t you think you can float off to France and muck everything up over there too. I’m not havin’ it!’

    â€˜Oh, yeah?’ sneered Mr Gum. ‘What you gonna do? You’re just a stupid little girl an’ you can’t do nothin’ against powerful kings like me an’ Billy.’
    Like lightning Mr Gum reached down and grabbed a heavy fishing net dripping with slime and dead