day Kat went to the Alzheimer’s unit to box up Mom’s belongings.
Kat had arrived sad, angry and distracted. A part of her still struggled with the decision she’d been forced to make and the not-so-subtle arm-twisting from Mom’s ER doctors, who wanted Kat to override Mom’s standing Do-Not-Resuscitate order.
“Your mother is still relatively young and fairly healthy,” a twenty-something intern said. “If we intubate and give her some help breathing, we might be able to bring her back.”
“Bring her back?” Kat had choked through her tears. “Will you bring her humanity, her sense of humor, the wit and charm I remember from my childhood, too? If you can guarantee her soul will come back, fine,” she’d shouted in the hallway of the hospital. “But if you’re just going to bring her back so she can waste away another few years without knowing her own name, let alone mine, then damn you to Hell for even suggesting it.”
Kat made her decision, but the pain and grief and finality of watching her mother take her last breath never completely went away. The grief would ease over time, she knew from her stepfather’s death. And Brady would keep Kat too busy and distracted to wallow in depression. But how would she deal with the heartbreak of all the future memories her mother would never have—Brady’s prom, his first girlfriend and broken heart, college graduation, a wedding?
As tears rolled down her cheeks, Kat blindly piled books and clothing and half-empty candy bags into the box she’d brought. The last paperback—a James Clavell novel reputed to be Mom’s favorite—slipped from her fingers and landed spine down on the floor. Two things fell out. A yellowed newspaper clipping and a folded piece of paper that, at first glance, looked like a check.
Kat had sighed. Her mother had been notorious for hiding money—especially after Kat moved Mom to the care facility. She picked them up, only slightly curious, and her heart nearly stopped.
The clipping was from the Copper Mountain Courier in Marietta, Montana. The cutline under the photo heralded the efforts of a local hardware store for rewarding top students. Identified, left to right, the straight-A student, his parents, and, representing Big Z Hardware: Grace Adair and Bob Zabrinski, owner.
Mom. Grace’s smile was one Kat hadn’t seen in many years, if ever. She looks so happy.
Because of the man at her side? Kat wondered, mouthing the name. Bob Zabrinski. She’d never heard Mom mention him. Ever.
She set the clipping aside to examine the other item, which, did indeed turn out to be a check. A never cashed payroll check, which included a $100.00 bonus.
Why would a pregnant woman, alone and broke, pass up the chance to cash a check made out to her? Because it was signed by Robert Zabrinski—the man who most surely had been Grace’s boss and quite possibly could be Kat’s birth father? Why the extra money? A hundred bucks was a fair sum in those days. Did he hope Mom would use it to get an abortion?
She ran her finger over the neat printing in the memo line: “Sorry you got caught in the middle, Gracie. Good luck, R”
Robert?
But possible and probable were two very different animals Kat knew. She couldn’t turn a stranger’s life upside down on a hunch. But neither could she spend the rest of her life not knowing the truth.
So, within three months she’d put the bulk of their belongings into storage—including, God forgive her, her mother’s ashes because she didn’t know what else to do with the plain metal box that was delivered to her a few days before their intended departure date. She’d already rented her house and packed the car. She had a job lined up, her ex-husband’s blessings, and no expectations, she told anyone who would listen.
“I need a change of scenery. Mom was happy in Montana. Maybe Brady and I will be, too. If not, then we’ll be back.”
And, so far, her only regret was not raising a ruckus over her