Merit Badge Murder Read Online Free PDF

up the phone to Lana. She giggled and squealed. I took the phone back and waited.
    "Oh," Riley said.
    "You have three minutes to get over here or I'm shooting her," I said as I hung up.
    "Oh Finny!" Lana touched my arm seductively. "You are so funny!"
    "It's Merry, not Fin and NEVER Finny," I snarled at the blonde.
    The doorbell rang right on time. I let Riley in and dragged him into the living room.
    "She is NOT living here!" I whispered angrily. Have you ever done that? It's far less menacing than you'd think.
    Riley held his hands up in front of him defensively. He should do that. I might hit him. I had a mean right cross, and he'd had some experience with that.
    "We don't have a choice. The agency thinks she's safer here, hiding out with you. At least until everything blows over in Kiev."
    "Oh, they did, did they?" My eyes narrowed. It was a good look—a look that has gotten me way more confessions than I'd deserved. "Well I don't work for the agency anymore, remember? And I'm not hiding out here—I live here now!"
    Riley nodded. He'd accurately assessed that I wasn't going to get violent with him just yet. "Hear me out."
    I folded my arms over my chest in the universal sign for you'd better make this quick and you'd better get this right.
    He sighed. "Lana needs constant supervision. You don't work. And we'll pay you. Sort of like a consultant." He gave me that big, stupid surfer grin that I was beginning to hate.
    "I don't work because I am between things at the moment. And consultancies are usually voluntary. And I didn't volunteer for this." I pointed to the wall separating us from the buxom blonde who was probably three more shots into the vodka at this point.
    "Besides," Riley continued as if I hadn't just said anything. "I'd feel better having someone around you 24/7 with these new situations popping up. And Lana was a trained FSB agent—she could be helpful." FSB were just newer initials for the KGB. It wasn't a lot different than the old, Cold War secret police, but I guess they thought they felt they needed a shiny new name for the same old tactics. Go figure.
    "Only if I need to seduce a Russian general—something there's a bit of a noticeable lack of here in the middle of nowhere," I grumbled.
    "Rileeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeeey!" Lana launched herself into the room and into Riley's arms. She buried her face in his neck and pressed her body so close to his I thought maybe they'd melted together. For some strange reason I felt a little prickle of jealousy. Now why did I feel that way?
    Riley pried the blonde off of him and held her at arm's length. "You can't do that here, Lana," he admonished gently. "Americans like their personal space. Remember?"
    She put her index finger on the corner of her mouth, and her eyes grew impossibly huge. I had to admit—the girl was good.
    "I am so sorry, Riley! I am just so excited to be Finny's roommate!"
    I was about to tear her throat out when Riley stepped between us.
    "Use contractions, Lana. American's never say I am —they say I'm.
    "Well, I guess she won't blend in. You'll just have to take her back to Langley and put her in a cage…" I said as I tried to shove them both toward the front door. They didn't move, dammit.
    Lana looked at me and pouted. Her eyes got all sad, and somehow she was able to dilate her pupils till they were huge. How did she do that?
    "Finny doesn't want Lana?" Her lower lip quavered. Oh no. This was not happening. Not here. Not now.
    I steeled myself. "That's right, Lana. Finny doesn't want Lana here. It's no good. It wouldn't work out."
    Lana burst into tears. Giant teardrops poured from the corners of her eyes, somehow not dislodging the makeup there. She dropped to the couch, and since it was lower than her knees, her black lace panties made a rather disturbing appearance.
    "First Putee throws Lana out. Then Russia throws Lana out. Now Finny, my only friend in the world does not want me!" She wailed in a voice that somehow made it