Memoirs of a Timelord Read Online Free PDF

Kulas.  Since I was just recently a student like you, I got insight into what you're going through right now."
           "So you're what...my high school guidance counselor?" I wisecracked before I absentmindedly took a tall gulp from the cup in my hand.  While my eyes saw milk, my tongue tasted the smoothest potato liquor I had ever experienced in my life.  Mellow up front, but with a fire in the belly, I felt the effects of the liquor immediately.
           "Whoa.  That's not Vodka." I croaked when I caught my breath.
           "Of course not, human Vodka is essentially low grade gasoline.  That's Cree.  Good stuff." Bara's huge form had no trouble slinking into a comfortable spot amongst the cushions.  No sooner had he found a perch than the bunnies all raced out of their hiding places and swarmed him.  At first I thought they were attacking him, but after a few minutes of watching my host wriggle around in contentment I realized they were cleaning him with their little bunny teeth.  I remember at the time I was pretty shocked at the sight.  Sure, back on earth we had those little birds that cleaned crocodile's teeth...that was sorta like this I guess?  It was just the strangest shower I had ever seen; Sasquatch being groomed by Tribbles.  What the fuck, over?
           "So did you spend a lotta time on Earth?" I pretended to ignore the bizarre bathing ritual, even though it looked like he was being swarmed by furry piranhas.  Bara actually seemed to be enjoying himself as dozens of bunnies dug into his nether regions.
           "Just a short snippet from the end of the Cretaceous period to the end of you.  I was all over that galaxy during the survey.  Played chase with saber-toothed tigers, watched the Spanish Inquisitions unfold, lived through a few plagues, three nuclear bombs and the computer revolution.  Your people have been an interesting species to edit.  My Master's thesis was based on management protocols employed on developing Earth."
           "I thought I was supposed to take care of the people in the Milky Way?" I was perplexed.  
           "No one may edit their own ancestors.  The galaxy is in a trust until you are of age.  Even as an Editor you will not have access to your own planet prior to your birth.  It is possible to erase yourself from an entire dimensional thread.  Go back far enough and you could completely delete yourself from all existence, deleted from all fifth dimensional threads entirely.  Naw, someone else has to manage your galaxy until you're ready.  Besides, the Boss just gave it a few nudges to get it where it needed to be." Bara made a strange hand motion as he indicated the path they had set humanity on.  All around him the bunnies were starting to withdraw to their hidey-holes.
           As I listened I used my enhanced eyes to take another look at the cave.  What I had originally mistaken as a rocky hole was actually packed with morphic matter.  Almost every surface showed the telltale DuNai signature.  I knew from my advanced devices training that the Class 5 material he was using could do fantastic things.  It wasn't just furniture; Bara could have turned the cave into a spaceship and flown away.  There were few devices that this material could not replicate.  Since I was still learning how to use the new technologies, and years away from actually building any of it, my abilities with morphic matter were limited.  The stuff was actually smarter than I was.  
           Lassie had curled up with Bara as soon as the bunnies were all gone.  Eyeing me warily, the poor dog hunkered down where it was safe from the evil intruder.  I felt like such an asshole for punching a puppy.
           "So what's up with the Supergirl outfit?" Bara looked at me with a twinkle in his multiple sets of eyes.  
           "Yeeaah..." I trailed off as I tried to come up with a G-rated explanation for sexual role-playing with the nanny.