Love Scars - 1: Scratch Read Online Free PDF Page A

people.
    Loud people. Obnoxious people. The two people types I hate.
    I was still in my room getting ready. The noise gave me high anxiety, but if I didn’t get out there soon Lisa was going to come find me. I put on a pair of shorts and a pink cotton tank top and pulled the curlers out of my hair. I’ve never been able to use a curling iron. I blow my hair almost dry and roll it up for ten minutes to get the frizz out.
    As I ran a brush through my hair, my sour expression in the bathroom mirror shocked even me. I smoothed the frown line between my eyebrows and tried to force a smile.
    Ack. Didn’t help.
    I sighed and went out to face the dragon, a/k/a our guests. This is for Lisa, I told myself. Normal people have parties. Normal people like parties. With Stacey away on her graduation trip, it was the perfect time to have one. Lisa shouldn’t have to suffer because she lives with her fucked up best friend.
    In the living room half a dozen people sat around the TV watching a couple guys play games from my niece’s retro collection, all violent. I couldn’t stand them, but they were Stacey’s way of dealing with what happened. I was in no position to judge someone else’s coping mechanisms.
    In the kitchen a girl Lisa worked with was cutting limes into wedges. “Hey, Nora,” she said. “Can you take these to Frank? He’s outside at the bar.”
    “Sure.” I couldn’t remember her name. I said, “The margaritas must flow!” It was supposed to be funny but came out sounding lame. I picked up the bowl of cut limes and went out to the back deck.
    The heat had let up now that the sun was going down, and a DJ was set up next to the keg on the lawn. Lisa never said anything about having a DJ. I had no idea where she came from. The lawn was thick with people dancing on the grass. Deep in the crowd, I caught a glimpse of Lisa’s blond hair and her arms up over her head.
    My nerves were doing their own dance in my stomach. Inhale…exhale… I’m such a wimp. I will not freak out. This is practice. If I could get through this party, maybe I could face Foresthill.
    Foresthill. See? I could think the word and not fall apart, as long as I wasn’t blindsided by it. I’d been thinking about Steve’s offer all afternoon. All my student loans paid. It would change my world. And if I found what Steve wanted and got the bonus, we could get the new roof the house desperately needed. Stacey could start college this fall without going into debt.
    “Hey, Nora, are those for over here?” Lisa’s boyfriend Frank called to me from the makeshift bar in a corner of the deck. He poured a red mixture into a cocktail shaker along with some ice and said, “Come get some.”
    I set the limes on the bar as he threw away the empty bottle of cheap vodka. Frank did everything with precision, and he always cleaned up his mess as he went. Plus he was happy all the time and played well with others. He was twenty-five, two years older than us, all angles and sharp edges, with light brown hair, hazel eyes, and a great smile, and he was super strong from working with horses and alpacas at the equine center.
    He poured his masterpiece into two plastic martini glasses, squeezed a lime wedge in each, and handed one to me. “Cranberry martini a la Frank.”
    I downed the cold drink in two gulps. “Oh, yeah. This recipe is a keeper.”
    He refilled my glass from the shaker and we sat down on the deck steps together. I forced myself to watch the dancing. I didn’t mind all the people in the house, but the ones on the lawn made me nervous as hell. They’re friends , I told myself. Friends of friends, anyway. Harmless.
    I remembered what Steve said outside Dr. Barton’s office: Face your fear and get to the other side of it . Something like that. Great concept. I’d get right on it.
    “I have a feeling I’ll need a few more of these,” I told Frank.
    “We all have our little crosses to bear,” he said as we clunked our plastic glasses