Love? Maybe. Read Online Free PDF

try to wipe the stickiness off my fingers.
     
    “Take a look for yourself,” Jillian says, nodding towardsomething behind me. Claire looks past me, a half smile forming on her face. I have to turn all the way around in my seat. What I see makes my heart beat too fast. Hillary King is standing with her back against one of the pillars. She is talking to her friend Katie, which in itself isn’t weird. But she’s doing it with her arms draped around some guy. And while I don’t really care who the guy is, I do care a whole lot about who the guy isn’t.
     
    “Wild, huh?” Jillian asks. Claire is looking at me with her eyebrows raised. Luckily the bell for second period rings. Jillian is the first to break off, following some guy with a soccer ball under his arm down the main hall. I say good-bye to Claire at the stairs toward the art wing, giving her a little hug and a fresh stack of napkins I scored from the caff. I have to keep telling myself to calm down as I make my way toward trig. I mean, who Hillary King is or isn’t currently dating should have no effect on me at all, but it does. Because if the scene in the caff is any indication, who she’s not dating anymore is Ben Donovan.
     

chapter four
     
    A t Montrose, ninety-eight percent of the student body looks like they just stepped out of an Abercrombie & Fitch ad or just got kicked off
Top Model.
But even though breathtaking is pretty much the norm around here, Ben Donovan still parts the students in the hallways like he’s Moses and they’re the Red Sea. I mean, I’ve only spoken to Ben Donovan once and that was to stutter hello when he nodded at me on the pool deck. Pretty much every girl in school has probably daydreamed about Ben Donovan at one time or another. And the weird thing is even the teachers refer to him that way—Ben Donovan. Never just Ben. It’s always first and last name. Ben Donovan, like even his name has to be set apart from the rest of us.
    And if I had to say exactly why I’ve been crushing on Ben Donovan since I was in seventh grade, I probablycouldn’t. I mean, it just sort of happened. But it’s not like anything will ever come of it. Ben Donovan is what Jillian calls “my ideal.” She says we all need someone in our life who is completely impossible. It keeps us hoping. I’m not sure I believe that, but it’s as good an explanation as any for the way my heart starts beating too fast whenever I see him.
     
    I write his name across the top of my paper in fourth period, considering it. Mr. Reyes is blah-blahing about some poet named Rumi. I’m trying to figure out more sayings for my Consternation Hearts when my cell buzzes. And when I say buzzes, I mean it actually sounds like bees are inside of it, letting me know that Charlie has gotten to my phone. Weird ring tones are his specialty. We’re not supposed to have phones in class, but everyone does. I slip my phone out of my pocket and hold it under my desk, so Mr. Reyes can’t see. It’s my mother. She’s recently discovered texting, which means she can tell me things as she thinks of them, instead of having to wait for the rare moments when we’re both free.
     

Working Late. Can u pick up L and D? M.
     
    I think about the rising mountain of homework that is threatening to bury me. I start to text her back, asking if she can call Mrs. Bateman, but before I can finish, Mr. Reyes is standing beside me, his hand outstretched. Everyone in class watches me as I hand off my phone. The bell rings forlunch and I gather my books together. Mr. Reyes doesn’t say anything as I walk past his desk. He just holds up my phone, along with a pink slip of paper. A detention. Hurray. This day just keeps getting better and better.
     
    “Where do you want to eat?” Claire asks when I meet her at my locker. She seems better—a little less liquid.
    “I’ll be in The Pit,” I say, holding up the pink slip. We can serve detention morning, noon, or after school. Since I’ll be