Louise Rennison_Georgia Nicolson 07 Read Online Free PDF Page A

“Look at my lap.”
    She said, “As I’ve said before, Georgia, you are an attractive girl and everything but I’m just not interested.”
    I said, “No, really look. Take a good look, drink in the sight. The bison horns are back!” I made up a little dance with the horns on either hand.
    Rosie said, “Sound out the bells of England—the fun days are back!”
    break
    Yes indeedy, even though I am on the rack of luuurve I have the bison horns to comfort me. As we ambled off to ace gang headquarters behind thefive’s court I said, “Do you know I can feel it in my waters, the bison horns are a symbol of hope. The fact that Slim gave them back is a sign from Baby Jesus, it is the dawn of a new era.”
    Ellen said, “What, er, do you, er, do you mean that people will be more spiritual and get back to nature and looking after the earth and…”
    Is she mad? I said, “No, what it means is that Masimo will be mine, mine all miney mine mine.”
    I said it to the gang, apart from Jas. Who I was ignorez vous ing like billio. She was doing reverse ignorez vous ing by pretending to be interested in what Ellen was saying.
    I said to the others, “In some ways I am looking forward to the autumn term because of course it means the return of the beret. Imagine the scene: a cold morning at Stalag fourteen, the gray day stretches ahead filled with lesbian perverts and sadistic ‘teachers’; but then up the hill past the Foxwood lads setting fire to their farts and generally being prats comes a sight to lift the spirits. Could it be? Is it true? Silhouetted against the sky is an awesome sight. It is the return of the ace gang in winter uniform. Berets proudly worn withbison horn attachments. Yesssss!”
    The gang broke into spontaneous Klingon saluting. Maybe everything is going to be alright.
    two minutes later
    When we got to our headquarters, Rosie donned her horns. She strolled up and down just enjoying the magnificence of her own horns.
    Once we all had them on, I said, “Perhaps this is a good time to repeat the ace gang manifesto, because some people who shall remain nameless to save them shame, and that means you, Jas, seem to forget about the ace gang when boys turn up.”
    Jas didn’t say anything, she just straightened her horns and smoothed down her fringe. In case she was going to have a violent spaz like this morning, I went behind Rosie because my ankle still hurts.
    Rosie said, “Yes, one for all and all for one and one for the road and so on.”
    Jas was still fiddling about with her fringe.
    So Rosie put her arm round me and Jas and said, “Let bygones be bygones, shake hands and let the rule of Horn reign.” Mabs, Jools, and Ellen were all looking at us.
    Mabs said, “One for all and one for the road and all for one.”
    I put my hand out first to Jas, which is vair vair nice of me seeing as it was me who was kicked. But that is me all over. Always the first to offer the hand of friendiness.
    After a little minute Jas held out her hand. Rosie raised her eyebrows, and the ace gang started doing wise (ish) nodding.
    Rosie said, “Now hug.”
    Jas gave me a little hug, and I sort of hugged her back. There was a bit of nunga-nunga contact, so I leapt back quickly and said, “Er…group hug, group hug.”
    This culminated in a group hug that nearly made my eyes pop out. Jools was so hyped up, she yelled, “One for all and all for one and all in a one for…anyway, hip hip hoorah for Merrie England and the ace gang!!!”
    We finished up with a sailor’s hornpipe (which I have to say was a spontaneous idea of mine. Because England is after all a seafaring nation and renowned for its hornpipes).
    Then Wet Lindsay and Astonishingly Dim Monica came round the corner wearing theirprefects’ badges. How uncool is that? Vair, vair uncool is the answer. They are always following us