Living Beautifully with Uncertainty and Change Read Online Free PDF Page B

IFE
     
    Aware of the suffering brought about by the destruction of life, I vow to not kill any living being. I will do my best to cultivate nonaggression and compassion and to learn to protect life.
    2. O N R ESPECTING W HAT B ELONGS TO O THERS
     
    Aware of the suffering caused by stealing or taking anything that belongs to others, I vow to not take what isnot offered. I will do my best to respect the property of others.
    3. O N N OT H ARMING O THERS WITH O UR S EXUAL E NERGY
     
    Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful or aggressive sexual energy, I vow to be faithful to my current partner and not harm others with my sexual energy. I will do my best to be aware of what harms myself and others and to nurture true love and respect, free from attachment. I aspire to serve and protect all beings.
    4. O N M INDFUL S PEECH
     
    Aware of the suffering caused by unmindful speech, I vow to cultivate right speech. Knowing that words can create happiness or suffering, I will do my best to not lie, to not gossip or slander, to not use harsh or idle speech, and to not say things that bring about division or hatred. I aspire always to speak the truth.
    5. O N P ROTECTING THE B ODY AND M IND
     
    Aware of the suffering caused by alcohol, drugs, and other intoxicants, I vow to not drink liquor or use drugs. I will do my best to live my life in a way that will increase my inner strength and flexibility as well as my openness to all beings and to life itself.
     
    It’s not enough, however, just to follow the rules—follow the precepts to the letter. Sticking to the outer form can bejust another way of strengthening my fixed identity, a way of shoring up my self-image as a virtuous person, as someone who’s purer than others. In other words, it may only strengthen pride. Unless I also include inner renunciation and admit to the ways I’m propping myself up by building this virtuous identity, then simply following the rules can be almost as damaging as breaking them.
    In The Way of the Bodhisattva, Shantideva lists all the ways he can think of to express being on the verge of speaking or acting neurotically. And in every case, he advises us not to do it. When feelings of desire or craving arise, or the urge to speak or act out of aggression arises, “Do not act!” he warns. “Be silent, do not speak!” That’s the basic instruction of the first commitment: Don’t act, don’t speak. That’s the outer work. And then there’s also the inner work of exploring what happens next when you don’t act and don’t speak. Shantideva’s advice is:
     
When the mind is wild with mockery
And filled with pride and haughty arrogance,
And when you want to show the hidden faults of others,
To bring up old dissensions or to act deceitfully,
And when you want to fish for praise
Or criticize and spoil another’s name
Or use harsh language, sparring for a fight,
It’s then that like a log you should remain.
     
    If there’s no temptation to act out, then the commitment to not harm won’t be as transformative as when we want to speak or act out—when we yearn for wealth, attention, fame, honors, recognition, and “a circle of admirers,” as Shantideva puts it—but we don’t follow throughon our desire. Maybe you want everyone to like you. Or you want to put someone down and cultivate advantage for yourself. Or you want to gossip. Or you’re impatient. Or you’re “sparring for a fight.” Maybe you’re tempted to engage in what Shantideva calls “haughty speech and insolence” or in cynicism, sarcasm, or condescension. If you acknowledge what’s happening and refrain from acting, that opens up some space in your mind. Clinging to views and opinions, thinking you’re always right and lording it over others, keeps you endlessly stuck. You continue to make people feel angry or inferior and keep landing in unnecessary battles. What’s the remedy? Examine yourself, Shantideva tells us. See exactly what you’re doing. “Note harmful