pounds 11 ounces . . . nursing every two hours . . . smiling at eight weeks, grasping at twelve weeks . . .ââmisses most everything. Only the supernatural gets at the actual. Or so it can seem to a mother on a good day, at least to the mother of a relatively easy baby, who is lying on her side, looking at a picture of an owl.
Rumpelstiltskin
Rumpelstiltskin is a small man with the exuberance and temper of a two-year-old child. He helps the millerâs daughter spin straw into gold. He helps her in this way not once, not twice, but three times! His help saves both the millerâs daughter and the miller. In some versions of the story, this even leads to the millerâs daughterâs marriage to the king. But Rumpelstiltskin doesnât do this for nothing; the third time he spins straw into gold, he does so in exchange for the millerâs daughterâs future as yet unconceived firstborn.
Still, Rumpelstiltskin isnât too bad a guy. When the millerâs daughter doesnât want to hand over her firstborn, Rumpelstiltskin offers her an out. He doesnât have to offer her an out, but he does. Thatâs why heâs kind of sweet. The famous out that he offers herâif she can guess his name within three tries then she doesnât have to give over her babyâwasnât part of their original deal. Why does he offer her an out at all?
Maybe naming a newborn baby isnât all that different from guessing the name of Rumpelstiltskin: any name is possible, but only one name proves to be right. It almost seems as if what Rumpelstiltskin is trying to do is to get the millerâs daughter to remember that she is his mother. Rumpelstiltskinâs name, in all the versions, in all the languages, translates into something like, âdear little goblin who makes noise with a stilt.â He is the firstborn, he is the original source of gold; heâs ambivalent about having a sibling.
How the puma affects others, one
A friend has two children with a woman to whom he is no longer married and he is now with a woman who has no children, and who probably wants to have children, though none of this has been openly discussed with me, I am surmising. The two children of the friend are now teenagers, and they themselves have a half sibling already, from their motherâs side, their mother who is known to be appealing but unreliable, able to land, say, in Chicago, before beginning to make phone calls to arrange for babysitting for her children in New York. My friend pays the half siblingâs college expenses. One gets the sense that he fears raising children again with someone who may reveal themselves to be not necessarily internally outfitted in a way suitable for the care of children, but again all of this is surmising, and my friend never mentions thoughts about maybe, or maybe not, having another baby, and knowing him as I do, it is reasonable to guess that he has also maybe not mentioned these thoughts to himself.
One evening, this friend arrives at our home, to meet the puma, when she is fresh, less than two weeks old. He arrives wearing a forty-pound vest. The vest, he says, is recommended as a way to build strength and endurance. Itâs just a thing heâs trying out. He just now walked the ten blocks from his home to our home, not too far. But with the vest. His teenage children and his girlfriend are with him too. They are often with him. He is very close to all of them. They say nothing about the vest. He apologizes for being a little late. He had been in a class for potential foster parents, he explains. We have never heard anything about this fostering interest before; it is new. âYou always dream of just the normal kid, with no issues, whoâs been orphaned by a car crash,â he said explaining his hesitation, but interest, in taking on foster children. âBut apparently itâs much more difficult than that.â
How the puma