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kept in a suitcase in her closet.
    On their honeymoon, she had enthusiastically wrestled his turgid flesh into a cocoon of spermicidal latex then injected herself with foam and lay back with her legs spread wide to receive him. Jeff’s erection had fainted dead away as if shocked by a taser-gun. Every night since had been some replay of the same. He’d learned to fall asleep to the whirr of the vibrator echoing from deep within her.
    “If you’d have only let me do it without this thing on this wouldn’t have happened!”
    Jeff looked down at his wife who lay there turning blue, her tongue lolling out of her mouth like a fat slug, turning purple, her eyes rolled up in her head, urine and spermicidal jelly leaking from her slack vagina. It was still stretched out from its many nights with the King Kong vibrator that substituted for him when he was unable to perform. He tore open her legs aggressively, nearly disjointing her hips in his enthusiasm. Taking his hardening sex in hand, he entered her lifeless husk and made love to her for the first time. All the pressure and performance anxiety gone. No expectations to live up to. No past lovers to compete with. No frustrated looks of disappointment to contend with. Two strokes in he knew she’d been right about him all along.
    She was wetter than he ever could have imagined and her vagina was a miracle of muscular development. It wasn’t just the body fluids evacuating her corpse or the involuntary contraction of her powerful kegel muscles as she spasmed in her death throes. It felt as if there were tongues inside of her, slurping on the tip of his tumescent cock. The sensation was overwhelming. Every muscle in his body locked and began to convulse violently as the orgasm erupted from him in a white molten torrent of shame. Premature ejaculation. Whatever it was wriggling and writhing within her (and Jeff was sure he didn’t want to speculate) it had quickly and efficiently milked him of his seed. Even dead she was too much woman for him.
    “My god! What the hell was that?”
    The death rictus on her face looked to him now like a mocking smile. Jeff withdrew his spent and shriveled organ from her lukewarm flesh and turned his head away from her eyes, which he could feel burning into his skull. Cold. Accusatory.
    “Fuck you! I’m a man! I’m a man, you heartless bitch! You just make me so nervous staring at me like that!”
    But she’s dead. Why should it matter how she looks at me? Jeff wondered.
    He reached out and closed her eyes. Now, she didn’t look so intimidating. She looked kind of pleasant except for that pained grin. Jeff tried to pull her lips down over her teeth, but wasn’t sure just how to do that. He tugged on them until he was afraid he would rip them off. Then he decided to pry her mouth open instead. He reached under the bed for his shoehorn and wedged it in between her teeth. With just the slightest bit of effort he was able to open her mouth. It was a mistake. She wasn’t snickering and grinning anymore. Now she was laughing boisterously.
    “Shut the fuck up! Shut up!” He yelled.
    He drew his hand back and slapped her across the face again and again, but her laughter continued.
    “I’ll shut your ass the fuck up.”
    He took himself in hand and leaned over her, jamming his limp penis into her mouth. She hadn’t given him a blowjob since the day he said, “I do”. But now she was in no position to refuse.
    “Who’s laughing now, bitch? Huh? Who’s laughing now?”
    The feel of her tepid saliva on the head of his manhood put the steel back in his erection. He began slowly fucking her face, ramming his stiffening cock down her throat. The idea of cumming in her mouth caused his organ to swell larger than it had in years. He could feel it throbbing deep in her esophagus as he raped her throat, thrusting harder and faster. He could feel the orgasm building, that familiar tingling sensation roiling at the base of his cock, but he withdrew,