Liberty Read Online Free PDF Page A

let go of her, closing his eyes. Last night after he had fallen asleep she snuck out to Wal-Mart and bought a few supplies that they would need. Soap. Deodorant. A shave kit. She also picked up a manlier-flavored Chapstick, but left it in the bag.
    Smearing cherry-flavored lip balm on his now soft lips was more appealing. She found herself applying it again even though his lips were no longer dry and cracked. They looked kissable. So much so that she puckered up and set a soft peck upon his mouth. It had been a long time since she had kissed him like that and the urge took her by surprise. She hadn’t wanted to kiss him in years. She couldn’t remember the last time she had done so.
    It must not have been like this, even though this kiss was simple. Just two pairs of lips brushing each other. But it caused Lexy to feel a tingle in a place she long ago thought was dead.
    Ryan must have felt the power of it, too. He must have noted the difference between this kiss and the others they had shared so long ago because his eyes fluttered open and he gazed at her before he slipped back to sleep.
    She stepped away from him, turned her back to him when that wasn’t enough. What the hell had she just done? Why had she kissed him? Why had she wanted to? She would never let herself forget what he had done to her. She would not let the passage of time dull her memories. She counted her scars every day. He was bad to her. She hated him. What on earth possessed her to do that?
    And why did she like it? The strange reaction by her body alarmed her. She wouldn’t do that again. She wouldn’t kiss him. His kisses were what got her in trouble in the first place. But it had been a long time since she’d had gentle human contact. For the past ten years she’d felt empty. Maybe she would start to date again after they divorced. Maybe she would find a nice man to spend time with. Not to marry.
    She would never marry again.
    She filled a basin with water and draped a towel over Ryan, determined to not let the kiss bother her too much. This must be a test, she thought. God was just seeing how strong she had become. He was wondering if she really took those Sunday school lessons to heart. Yes, she reassured herself, that must be it.
    She lathered him up with the spice-scented shave gel. If he were in his right mind he would have objected to this, too. As long as she had known him he had been shaving with that old-fashioned canned foam that cost less than a dollar.
    Taking care to avoid his recent scars she began to shave his face. At some point he opened her eyes and studied her.
    “Jesus, you’re gorgeous,” she muttered as she revealed a portion of his wide, chiseled jaw. “I guess I forgot how good-looking you were. I married you because you were handsome, but now I kinda wish God would have gave you more brains than beauty. Maybe we wouldn’t hate each other so much.” She swirled the razor around in the water to clear it. “I guess that’s why you joined the marines.” She looked at him more seriously. “Why did you enlist?” Her shave finished, she wiped his face with a towel. His eyes were barely open at this point. He was lost again in that state of near slumber. “Did you do it to make your mama proud, or did you want to get away from me that bad?”
    She knew she had wanted him to go.
    “No,” she heard a sweet Southern voice say. “He wanted to make you proud.”
    She found her mother-in-law standing there. Mary was an adorable, fluffy-ash-blonde-haired lady. A real lady who wore pink cardigans and pearls. A lady with a soul as gentle as her son’s was brutal.
    She was crying.
    Just as Lexy had when she had seen him for the first time. He looked much better now and she was glad that Mary hadn’t seen him at his worst.
    “My baby,” she whispered as she walked over to him. She looked unsure, afraid that he might break.
    “It’s okay, Mama. He’s sleeping. He’ll be okay. I’m sure.”
    She believed her words.