Leaving Paradise Read Online Free PDF Page A

back. “I’m coming,” she says, tossing her hair once again with a flick of her head, before entering the house. I’m left alone. Outside.
    I’m fine with alone. I’m used to alone. Alone is comfortable for me, it’s quiet and doesn’t demand I be happy or satisfied or . . . asked any questions. I try not to think about what it was like when I wasn’t alone, when I was an integral part of the social scene. When Kendra and I weren’t enemies or friends, but hung with the same people. And even if we weren’t socially equal, then at least we were on the same social playing field.
    Get-togethers wouldn’t have been the same without me.
    Now it’s not the same with me.
    I sit on a lounge chair by the pool. A few minutes later the party has multiplied and people start congregating and dancing on the patio. I am still alone, but within the crowd.
    Brianne is hanging onto Drew Wentworth, Paradise High’s varsity quarterback. His hands are all over her as they dance close to a slow song blaring from the second-story window.
    Danielle and Sabrina are huddled in a corner, gossiping and giggling. After a while some guys pull them onto the patio and start dancing with them. The scene reminds me of those California teen reality shows. I stick out like a sore thumb wearing a pink Juicy Couture outfit. I open my purse, glance at the emergency numbers my mom gave me just to make sure they’re still there, then close my purse back up. Surely becoming an outcast when you were previously popular isn’t considered an emergency, is it?
    Kendra and Brian start putting on their own public dance show right on the diving board after changing into bathing suits. Everyone gathers around, chanting for the couple to jump in. Kendra loves the attention, she’s used to it. Her family has owned the biggest parcel of land in Paradise for the past two hundred years. Her dad has been the mayor for the past ten years, and her grandfather was the mayor before that. Some girls are born to have it all.
    Soon a bunch of other seniors come out of the house wearing bathing suits. Danielle walks over to me. “Did you bring a suit? Sabrina and I are going to change in Brian’s room.”
    If I came out wearing a bathing suit showing all my scars, I’d probably clear the place out. “My doctor says I can’t swim yet,” I lie.
    “Oh, sorry. I didn’t know.”
    “No problem,” I say, pulling out the cell.
    While Danielle and Sabrina run up the stairs, I hobble out the door and dial the number to my mom’s work.
    “Auntie Mae’s Diner. Can I help you?”
    “Hey, Mom, it’s me.”
    “Are you okay?” she asks.
    “I’m fine. Having a blast,” I say as I limp away from Brian’s house and start walking down the street. I don’t know where I’m going. Someplace private . . . quiet . . . where I don’t have to think about what I’m missing. A place I can close my eyes and focus on my future.
    A future without Paradise.
    I can imagine the smile on my mom’s face as she says, “See . . . and you were worried you wouldn’t fit in. Don’t you feel silly now?”
    “Absolutely.” The truth? I feel absolutely silly that I have to lie to my mom.

five
    Caleb
    I’m keeping a permanent smile on my face at my mom’s welcome-home party for me, just like my dad ordered. It’s a fake smile, but my mom’s friends seem to be buying it.
    I think.
    My mom has been all over me, laughing and hugging me in public as I play the reformed son. I wonder how long I can keep up this farce before I can’t take it anymore. Forget me, how long can she keep it up? Dad doesn’t even seem to notice her Jekyll and Hyde transformation. Why do appearances matter so much to my parents?
    “Caleb has become religious while he’s been away,” Mom tells Mrs. Gutterman as she grabs my elbow and makes me face the reverend’s wife. “Isn’t that right, Caleb?” she says.
    “I prayed every day,” I say, not missing a beat, and knowing it’s not only Mrs. Gutterman