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gloves when you’re reading those?”
    Mom gave me a blank look. “Hm?”
    â€œNever mind.”
    She probably thinks it’s okay to go out with Kevin because I’m such good friends with Sasha. But I don’t know Kevin that well; he’s always just been Sasha’s older brother.
    I wonder if Sasha knows that Kevin phoned me?
    Maybe he won’t even call me back.

July
    Thursday, July 1st / Friday, July 2nd, midnight
    Hundreds of us packed the causeway from Laurel Point to the Inner Harbour and waited for it to get dark. People bobbed in canoes and outboard motor boats, too. The show didn’t start till after ten o’clock. Kevin and I claimed spots right by the garden that spells Welcome to Victoria in begonias and pansies. We saw the glittering explosions and their reflections on the water. Sometimes the light zoomed right at us, and the crowd gasped like one person. At the end, “O Canada” played, and red and white-gold sparks filled the sky.
    Kevin smoked the whole time. That must be why he’s always chewing something when he’s at home—he’s not allowed to smoke in the town house. He looked amused by the whole celebration, and people usually smiled at him as they passed. I envied his confidence. When the national anthem played, he sang at the top of his lungs. Some drunken teenagers stumbled over to join him, and everyone linked arms, including me. As I swayed back and forth, scrambling to support the wasted girl beside me, it hit me: I was downtown at night without a parent, mine or anyone else’s. Freedom smelled of salt water and outboard motor oil.
    As we walked back to the car, Kevin told me more about tree-planting, about the blackflies and the rain and working ten-hour days six days in a row, then going in to Prince George and getting drunk on his day off. He noticed me shiver as the wind picked up and put his arm around me. “For warmth,” he said. It seemed to me that we got some funny looks; was it because he’s so much older than me?
    On the way home, he took the “scenic route” and stopped at a pull-off overlooking the ocean. He twisted the keys in the ignition and the car rumbled to a halt. Wind rushed in the window.
    â€œIs this your first date, Natalie?”
    I didn’t want to answer him. The amused expression that seemed to make everyone else warm up to him didn’t feel so good when he trained it on me. He was laughing at me with his eyes.
    â€œHey, it’s okay. Only, maybe you don’t know what to expect.”
    I felt trapped in the car. “I don’t know what you mean, but I want to go home.”
    â€œAlready?” He reached out and smoothed back my hair. I could smell the nicotine on his fingers. The calluses on his palm scraped my cheek, but he touched me gently. It felt okay. “I was so surprised when I saw you downstairs the other night.”
    â€œI know, I’m sorry. It’s just—”
    He shook his head. “No worries. But you want to know what I was thinking?”
    His fingers brushed a sensitive spot on the back of my neck. I shuddered.
    â€œI give up.”
    â€œWhat a babe.”
    In the center of my chest, something strawberry-sized melted into liquid warmth.
    â€œAfter, I kept picturing you standing there, and that’s when I knew I had to call.”
    He put his arm around my shoulders, pulled me towards him, and squeezed. His hands rubbed my back and razor stubble scratched my face. His mouth slid onto mine. I pressed my lips together but he tongued them open, his jaws wide. Yuck, smoker’s breath. He was suddenly breathing hard, like he’d just surfaced from underwater, desperate for air. It scared me. I jerked my head and twisted in his arms. “Let me go!”
    â€œWhat’s the matter?”
    I was huddling against the door on my side of the car. He seemed annoyed, but not for long.
    â€œNever done that before,