Just in Case Read Online Free PDF Page A

thought runs along the outside of the cylinder as well, repeating ad infinitum.’ He looked animated at the possibility. ‘That could mean that a thought actually has happened – in the sense of having taken place somewhere in the universe – along the outside of the cylinder, but can’t exactly be attributed to me as an individual. Or not yet, anyway.’
    Justin stared.
    ‘Let’s say, for instance, that you have the same dreamover and over, only each time you’re not sure whether you actually had the same dream before or just dreamt that you did.’ He looked at Justin expectantly. ‘It could relate to the thinning boundaries between reality, that is to say active expenditure of energy, and thought, or passive energy. Either way, the existence of the act, or in this case, the dream, is not in doubt. The question you have to ask is how does it exist, and how do we define the energy of thought versus the energy of action. You’ve posed a very interesting question here.’
    He paused.
    ‘Take Boy. Does he exist or doesn’t he? You see him, I see him. Is that enough to vouch for his existence? I would say it is. Surely there’s a point at which an idea conjured by more than one brain has existence, not merely in the philosophical sense, but in the sense of being the object of expended energy. I’m quite interested in thought as energy, as valid an expression of energy as –’ he paused, watching Boy race a squirrel to a tree – ‘as a running dog.’
    Boy granted the squirrel freedom and it spiralled, panicked, up to safety.
    ‘It’s not exactly what you’d call fate. But possibly relevant in its way.’ Peter smiled apologetically.
    Justin felt dazed by Peter’s string of connections. His own brain soared and crashed, groped endlessly for elusive footholds in reality. There were dark corners he didn’t dare enter, creaking catacombs lined with the corpses of doubt,incomprehension and paranoia. His brain didn’t grapple with theories, it grappled with fear.
    They walked on in silence. A few hundred metres later where the road split, Justin stopped, wondering whether there was one last comment to be made. He couldn’t think of one.
    ‘Goodbye,’ he said.
    Peter watched him go.
    ‘Justin!’
    Justin turned.
    ‘I… I think you should meet my sister. She’d like you. I mean, you might like her too.’ The embarrassed smile. ‘Anyway, you should meet.’
    Justin only nodded, but Peter looked pleased, as if something important had been settled.
    Each boy headed home, deep in thought.

12
    Life continued to pursue Justin. In his second week of school, as he made his way towards the changing rooms after PE, the athletics coach pulled him aside.
    ‘Case!’ Coach barked. ‘Ever thought about cross-country?’
    Boy’s ears flicked forward. He liked a good run.
    Justin looked behind him.
    ‘You, Case! Did you hear what I said?’
    Justin nodded.
    ‘Well? We need more runners this year.’
    ‘But I can’t run.’
    ‘Bollocks,’ Coach spat. ‘Look at you. With a little training you could run all day.’
    Justin stared at Coach, amazed and suspicious. David Case had never looked like a runner. It was one thing to change your shirts, quite another to assume an entirely different body type.
    ‘Case!’ Coach snapped impatiently. ‘You’re not brain-dead, are you? That could disqualify you.’
    Justin shook his head: But I hate sport. And then: Perfect.
    Coach rolled his eyes. ‘An answer, Case. Any answer will do.’
    ‘OK,’ said Justin. Boy wagged his tail.
    Peter grinned when he heard. ‘You’ll like it,’ he said. ‘Not at first, of course, it’s horrible at first. But you get used to it eventually.’
    Justin didn’t expect to like it, now or ever. Cross-country seemed a perverse sort of self-abuse consisting of endless gruelling runs through the unattractive suburban landscape egged on by a wisecracking sadist whose life had repeatedly been blighted by mediocrity.
    Coach’s team had