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They went up to sleep after asking what we had been up to and both Kelly and I replied, “Nothing much.”
     The honeymoon was over, and so was our time together.  We had spent nearly every night in each other’s bed comforting each other.  Kelly and Laura had to go to their house and pack up their things and officially move in this house.  Kelly just brought over a few things, and each day if she managed to get out of bed, then she would bring a few more things.  She had brought some stuff over for Laura so when she came back from the honeymoon she could stay here.  It was all going so fast.  We had spent nights talking, doing things that lovers do.  Kelly said she would take the year off college and that she had read about ways to have a baby at college.  There were so many support units.  It all sounded great, and in her eyes it was a fantastic idea.
    There was just one problem.  The more she talked about it, the more I thought I could keep it up.  We were soon supposed to be going to college, both of us.  Not to the same one, but did I really want my life set in stone now?  I couldn’t have her think that this was what I wanted when I had no clue what I wanted.  Up until a few weeks ago, I couldn’t handle the idea that Dad was marrying her mom.  I hadn’t even grieved over the death of my own mother.  There was so much fucked up shit inside my head.  She couldn’t deal with that, and I didn’t want her to.  That just wouldn’t be fair.
    “I can’t do this anymore,” I whispered as we were sitting on the sofa watching a movie.  I had to be honest. I was pretending that I was okay with the whole thing. Smiling at her and being sick behind her back.  Fuck, at one point, I thought I was pregnant too, because I seemed to be having morning sickness or whatever they call it.  Not sure why they call it morning sickness when Kelly seemed to be sick all day long at times.
    Kelly wanted us to have sex last night. I couldn’t perform, and this was the reason why.  I had to stop pretending and come clean.
    “I found this clinic online. I think we should go there.”
    She shook her head as she clicked through the pages of the leaflet.  “You decided this without consulting me?” Tears welled up in her eyes and dropped like little petals as she continued to flick through the pages. 
    “It looks nice.” She got up and headed up the stairs.  No doubt to her room.  I heard it slam shut as I stood at the bottom of the stairs. I should have tried talking to her and told her the truth.  Our parents were married. We were stepbrother and sister.  How the fuck was it supposed to work?  I couldn’t think of a better solution to our problem.  It wasn’t even a baby, it was just a fetus.   The quicker she had the abortion, the less likely she would get attached to the thing.  I had booked an appointment for her to go in the morning.  She had spent all of high school trying to get into her business major.  I just about got into, The college of Jersey, Kelly got into NYU.  This was the best thing to do for both of us. I couldn’t stay in the house.  I had to go for a ride.  Before I jumped in the car, I sent her a message.  I gave her a few minutes to get her head around it all.
    Me: Booked you in for 10am, so be ready for 9.30 in the morning. Seb.
    I was shocked when she replied straight away.  A cold wind embraced my face as I worried about what she would say
    Kelly: Sure.
    My eyes froze on the screen for a few minutes.  She had said nothing more.  Just the one word that I wanted to hear.  A smile crossed my face as I shut the door and walked to the car.  I hesitated as I looked up at her window.  She was standing there.  I wanted to wave or even ask her to come with me.  Maybe we needed to talk.  Kelly drew her curtain and turned on the light. 
    This was going to be hard for both of us.  But, in the end, it was the best solution.  I repeated this to myself over and over again