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next morning, having passed out on the cots in the corner, compliments of one of the brother's Army days. Son was asleep on the ground, obviously not staying the night with whoever he chose to fuck the night before. We took turns using Bill's industrial kitchen sink to clean up, and did one last run through of the plan to leave Missouri. Dig and Son were going to meet up with Son's mother just outside Little Rock, Arkansas where he'd stashed her until this as all over. Even though her and Dig never got together officially, we all knew he had strong feelings for his child's mother. She loved him, but not the life or the fact her only son was going to be part of the same life that claimed his father. Despite this, they stayed together in their own odd way, and Dig made sure she was clear of Missouri and MM when we set the wheels of this plan in motion.
    As much as I want ed to go to my house, I knew it wasn't safe. I'd meet up with Dig in Little Rock the next day and we'd head back to San Antonio. With nothing to do after they left, I decided to try and get a little more sleep, sober sleep. I finally woke as the sun was setting, feeling better than when I laid my head down. I snuck into Bill's kitchen for a bit to eat. Not feeling up to listening to his stories, I decided to take it back to the garage. It was a shitty abode, but I needed some time alone. My head wasn't pounding with pain, but it was overflowing with thoughts that I needed to get under control.
    I found myself lying on my cot, just letting time pass me by. Scrolling through some pics on a phone I'd disconnected, I reminisced. The phone was nothing more than a shell, no longer having service, but it had pictures Elle and I took one night. I'd looked at them a million times over the past few weeks, torturing myself but unable to resist seeing her smile, her golden eyes, and that fucking mane of hair I wanted to dig my fingers into. Obviously, I was not successfully clearing my head.
    I stared at one of her I took while she was sleeping. Creeper? Fuck yeah. Did I care? Fuck no. She's beautiful.
    H er hair was spread out in a mass across the pillow, stray curls falling over her bare back. I remember it like it was yesterday. I'd killed someone, and for some reason felt extra dirty when I got to her place. I showered and scrubbed my skin until it was raw, hoping to wipe any traces of the monster off me before I got into bed with Elle. Each kill had become harder and harder to not feel the deeper I got with her. I crawled into bed next to her, wrapping my body around her sleeping form, trying to soak up some of that light.
    As if sensing my need, a need that went far deeper than physical, Elle woke and clutched onto me, pressing her body and her light against me. We didn't fuck, we made love—slow, intense, soul shattering love. I'd woken early in the morning, the first rays of sun peeking through the window. The light danced across her creamy skin. I wanted to run my hands through her soft hair, let my hands explore the curve of her back, her hip, her shoulder, basically every inch of her skin. She talked in her sleep that night, though, letting me know it was a fitful sleep. I didn't want to wake her knowing she'd only fallen into calm sleep mere hours ago, but I couldn't resist taking a picture of her bare skin, the sheet pulled down so her back and the curve of her ass showed. It was erotic in its simplicity. She'd finally stopped mumbling and jerking, finding peace in sleep. So instead of waking her to feed the beast that wanted to be inside of her again, I let her sleep—but I took a picture. I couldn't resist.
    It was this photo I was staring at, had been staring at, when a text from an unknown number came in.
    She's at the aquarium with a bottle of Cuervo.
    Fuck. That was code. Elle was with José at Aquario? What the fuck was she doing in brown town? Despite the fact that I knew I was taking a huge risk, I hopped on my bike. I told myself I was just going