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question. They didn’t want to lose any tourists after all, and I wondered who would bear the brunt for what was happening to me.
    I tried to keep my mind off the fact that I was slowly ris – ing in the air but I kept seeing myself that first horrifying time, years ago, standing frozen on the side of a moun – tain pass unable to go up or down as I stared hypnotized at the wide expanse of mountain dropping away beneath me on both sides. It had happened so fast. One moment perfectly comfortable, the next a raging agoraphobic par – alyzed by fear; and it had never gone away. Now I was swinging wildly in the air, attached to a ship that was rolling and pitching like a drunk in search of the can.
    The Zodiac swayed in the wind, the crane bucked with the ship, and I slowly rose. The crane began turn – ing me into the ship before it should have and I could see the rust spots on the ship’s side and the water crawling down to find the sea again. Suddenly, sickeningly, the Zodiac lurched violently and the floorboards supporting my weight gave way to air. I was swinging on the bosun’s chair, the Zodiac tilted upwards and swinging beneath me, its stern pointing straight down at the sea. I swung into the side of the ship. The force of impact took my breath away and I felt the Zodiac bouncing off the ship below me. I swung out again, away from the ship, and felt myself rapidly rising. I guessed that the crane opera – tor was trying to get me high enough fast enough so that I wouldn’t bash into the side of the ship again, or I fer – vently hoped so. I looked down, which was a mistake: the churning water mirrored my stomach. I thought I could hear people yelling and suddenly the water below me vanished and was replaced by a wildly moving deck strewn with ropes, Zodiacs, and several crewmembers struggling to control the rogue Zodiac and the spinning contraption that I had become.
    I felt strong hands grabbing at me and voices asking me if I was okay. I wasn’t, of course. My stomach, too long denied, surrendered at last.

Chapter Four
    I woke with a start. Bad idea. My stomach lurched and I groaned. I could hear a deep rumbling in the bow of the ship, somewhere near me, in fact. It awoke some long ago memory and I knew it was the anchor chain rumbling through its tunnel, winching round its drum, coming home to lodge its anchor at the bow of the ship, snuggled in against the hull, held there by the chain, held there by the winch, held there by the brake. The ship was waking up, the almost imperceptible sound of its engine coming alive, revving up as the ship’s crew took her out to sea.
    I looked at the clock on the table beside my bed: 4:30 p.m. I’d only been asleep an hour. Light streamed in from the porthole and I caught some flashes of sun through the swirling fog. A good sign, I hoped. Maybe the sun would chase the wind away and with it the waves. I’d been on board less than two hours and it felt like two weeks. How was I going to get through nine days of lectures if I felt like this every time the waves acted up? I was grateful that the motion of the ship had calmed down, but it felt like I was riding a sleeping mon – ster, breathing gently. I felt like tiptoeing to keep it asleep and prayed it didn’t have nightmares.
    I’d been given a cabin of my own, I guess because I was a lecturer, or female, or both. But it was a really nice cabin so they must have run out of crews’ quarters for me. They couldn’t bunk me in with any of male lectur – ers, and from what Terry had said I’d deduced that I was the only female member of the expedition crew, on this trip anyway. Except, of course, for her. I wondered where she was sleeping. The cabin was well laid out with every conceivable space being put to good use. It was actually two rooms: a tiny outer cabin leading to an even smaller bedroom. There were two beds in the bedroom along two walls, with