Independent Jenny Read Online Free PDF

on.”
    A lot of analysis and a fair amount of tears and chocolate hobnobs later, Sadie made me lunch then told me what she thought.
    “Look, I know Mum’s not exactly an ideal person to mention when we’re discussing wedded bliss, or whatever, but do you ever think if she’d stayed and fought for her marriage, she might not have been divorced so many times?”
    I shrugged my shoulders.
    “Just something to think about. You might be able to work through this and save your marriage.”
    “I guess.”
    “On the other hand, I hate Ross for doing this to you.”
    We moaned about him for a while, but then I changed the subject, keen to talk about something else. I left about 2pm and it was on the drive home that I felt empty, lost and lonely. Is this what weekends would be like? Attending weddings as a bitter, cynical photographer, and then visiting friends and relatives who’d bitch about Ross with me before I returned home to an empty house?
    I spent the journey thinking up things I’d say to him if I were to contemplate getting back together. I’d put the idea out of my mind all week but now I was starting to wonder if I could do it. If I could take him back and trust him again.
    When I got in, I called him. He seemed surprised but pleased to hear from me and we chatted for a while about how our weeks had gone.
    “Can I see you tonight?” he asked after a while. He sounded nervous.
    “I don’t know…”
    “Why don’t I come round with Aiden? We can just hang out, the three of us, as friends?”
    “I guess so.” It would certainly be easier if Aiden was there, and we could try and at least act normal without debating what’d gone on and what might happen next.
    And so on Sunday at six, the doorbell rang and there, acting like a formal guest outside his own home, was Ross and just behind him was Aiden, smiling awkwardly. I knew he’d be feeling weird about this but I was glad he’d tagged along. Ross gave me a quick hug and went into the kitchen with a bag of Chinese food. Aiden gave me a hug too and whispered in my ear:
    “How you doing? I told him he’s an arse, you know.”
    “Thanks Aiden.”
    He smelled nice. As he pulled away from the hug, our eyes locked and suddenly I thought: why hadn’t I gone with Aiden, instead of Ross? He wasn’t as lazy or selfish enough to ever cheat on a woman. We looked at each other for a moment and something sparked in my chest. Then, as if he’d heard the flame ignite, he looked alarmed and walked away quickly.
    What was wrong with me? Was I really that much of a mess that I was now getting a crush on my brother-in-law? I sighed and went through to the dining room, where Ross was getting out plates and glasses. We sat and tucked into the food and drank the wine. Aiden and I did most of the talking, mostly him asking me about my week, about seeing my sister, and so on. It felt staged and strange and I kept wishing Ross wasn’t there so we could just talk normally and I could tell him how I really felt about my week. Aiden had always been a friend to me, but somehow Ross’ actions had now put a divider up between us.
    “I’ve had a manic week,” Ross butted in while I was talking about Sadie.
    “Oh yeah?” I asked, sipping some wine. I hadn’t eaten much and was on my third glass. It was quickly going to my head and somehow, Aiden was looking more and more attractive compared to his cheating, lying bastard of a brother.
    Ross started talking about work and I listened while nibbling on a pancake roll. Now that I thought about it, I remembered that Aiden had hinted he liked me when we first met, at their parent’s house the first Christmas I’d spent with them. Ross had a headache on Christmas Eve, and went to bed early. Aiden and I sat up late talking and he’d said something like;
    “Ross is a lucky guy. If I’d met you first…”
    Or something like that. And we had a moment. We nearly kissed. Or had I imagined it? I’d only been seeing Ross a few months