getting it.
He wasn’t understanding that a person’s kinks were decided for them, largely, not the other way around. And Todd—so vanilla and normal, which normally was something she loved about him—had just bypassed all of the interesting stuff.
But, trying to acquiesce and be cooperative, she nodded slowly. “Maybe...maybe you’re right.”
Taking a breath, she stood up and hugged him. So much for that effort.
“I’m sorry I’m moody.”
He gripped her hard. “It’s all right. That's all just, super weird, right? I mean, what was this guy like, who actually dug doing that sort of thing?”
“Um,” Sophia felt quite vulnerable now. Todd was talking about someone else...but he was really talking about her. “I don't know. He was a guy.”
“It just seems so... weird , you know? That someone would want that? I read that was like a sexual disorder to want that sort of thing. And like, I don't want to see you with another girl. That's weird. It seems like, you know, a sort of insanity to me. I mean, sex with just one person, by itself, is great enough, isn't it? Why complicate things?”
Oh god.
“Y-yeah,” Sophia laughed. “You're right. I'm sorry. This was just...just a joke. Haha.”
Todd, oblivious, nodded.
“You want to be dominated.” He smiled and shook his head. “I guess I'll put you on a leash and tug you around on a collar, huh?”
It was awfully strange, having a mixture of shame and arousal slip through a person at once. The problem was, Sophia would have loved if he did that. But no...no, she hadn't been able to stand up for herself, and Todd had made it all a joke, now.
A problem for “Future Sophia,” obviously.
Normally, she loved his ability to make jokes of anything. But when the core of her became the butt of his mirth...it was hard to cope.
That night, they had sex as usual. He even called her a slut and (halfheartedly) tugged her hair, smiling and chuckling as he did it. She had to smile with him, even though on the inside she was completely mortified. Her inner-kink was just sobbing and wailing in a corner, trying to shut off reality.
And, despite her best efforts, despite all her trying to get in that proper head space, she couldn’t orgasm, and truth be told—she could barely enjoy him at all.
Chapter 5
Back at work, after lunch, she tried to learn the ebbs and flows of the office. An average of three people came and dropped by something for her to review and give to Sand every five minutes.
After Elle left lunch early to get back to her dance studio, Sophia had been able to spend a good half-hour reading the packet. She found out all sorts of odd, idiosyncratic information:
- Mr. Sand arrived every morning at 6 AM. Her own arrival was not to happen past thirty minutes of his.
- Mr. Sand wanted constant streams of new, non-lyrical music that “wasn’t any of that weird new-age crap.” Repetitions of music he had already heard would be frowned upon.
- Entering his office was to be preceded by three knocks, every time, even in emergencies.
- Anyone besides her attempting to enter his office was to be accompanied by her, and every word exchanged between he and the visiting party written down.
- If Mr. Sand wore a cream-colored tie, he wanted a salad for lunch. A blue tie indicated something meaty. Three blue ties in a row indicated he was going to be skipping lunch altogether.
It was, all in all, a lot to take in.
Gathering her composure, Sophia entered his office with another cup of coffee. One sugar, no cream, spun three times around with a cinnamon stick.
She entered the office and took exactly seven seconds to approach his desk at the other end of the room. He was typing at a computer, and apparently hadn’t noticed her.
That was fine by Sophia.
She walked around to the far right side of his immense tree-stump desk, and set down the coffee on the self-heating coaster within arm’s reach. The only way this was possible was by bending over,
Debra Cowan, Susan Sleeman, Mary Ellen Porter