Illicit Craving (Bend To My Will #5) Read Online Free PDF Page A

the grip of something he couldn’t control, Jacob ripped away the sheets and got up.
    In the bathroom, he threw cold water on his face, washing away the sweat. He was helpless to cleanse the frightening thoughts from his mind, or achieve peace. As an adult, Jacob should be able to put old memories behind him, but he was incapable of doing so.
    He went out to the dark main room, surrounded with windows looking out into the night. Glimmers of city light gave life to the otherwise gloomy landscape below. It was black, as black as the horror he tried to repress. His back stung with pain that should have faded long ago.
    Jacob was tormented by a period when life was hell, and he had no escape. Yet he seemed completely incapable of putting it behind him, burying it in the past where it belonged. For all his success and power, the darkness in his soul refused to recede.
    The horrible memories persisted. The damage had been done and was irreparable. Take your clothes off, Jacob . The voice sounded real, as close as if it were happening now. He rubbed his hands over his face, forcing the thoughts out of his head.
    But they didn’t go away, only went into temporary remission, to be called forth during the fitful sleep he endured. Night after night, Jacob fought back, attempting to banish the torment that wouldn’t go away. After so many years, the past had taken on a life of its own, refusing to obey Jacob. No matter how he approached it, he failed to wipe out the darkness, and the unwelcome memories that worked to destroy him.
    The worst part was that now he had involved Vivienne. Although Jacob knew better, he had allowed her in his bed, and she had witnessed his nightmares. He’d tried to brush them off, telling her to go back to sleep. But she would surely ask more questions.
    Jacob couldn’t blame her for that. Vivienne had questioned him about the very darkness he strove to protect her from. But he refused to speak of it. Sharing the past would pull her into it, and make her a part of it, which might ultimately destroy her.
    Conflicted, Jacob dropped into a chair and stared into the bleak night sky. He’d erred, and he knew it. Vivienne could not be a part of his life, not really. Yet she already was, and that made it worse. To live with his torment alone was bad enough, but to ruin her innocence would be a sin that Jacob wouldn’t recover from. He had to make sure that didn’t happen.
    *****
    Jacob went for a run every morning, sweating and breathing hard, to shed the shadows of the night before. He refused to let his issues gain the upper hand, and the workouts provided a welcome release. Plus, most mornings while he ran through the park, he brainstormed business dilemmas. With a clearer head, and a freer soul, he went back to the penthouse to shower and dress.
    Rinaldi Imports was a fast-moving, growing concern. Managing the company required Jacob to stay on the cutting edge of the industry and applicable technology. Getting lost in work was his passion, as well as solace from personal torment. During the day, he had no opportunity to think of anything but business.
    On Tuesday, his older brother called. Gianni was busy running his fashion merchandizing business, so didn’t find the time to call very often. Jacob was close to his brother, but due to their career demands, they didn’t get together frequently.
    “Hey, Gianni.”
    “Glad I caught you, Jacob. How are you?”
    “Good, everything’s good.”
    “Glad to hear it,” Gianni said. “I should call to catch up with you more often, but you know how that goes.”
    “Yes, same here. It’s always something.”
    “Well, I happened to hear a rumor that I thought you should know about.” Gianni hesitated. “I found it a bit alarming.”
    “I’m listening.”
    “This guy I do business with mentioned to me that there is seminar coming up, invitation only. I want to make sure you know about it.”
    The concern in Gianni’s voice had Jacob’s attention.