I Kissed Dating Goodbye Read Online Free PDF Page A

person's primary value comes from the way he or she looks and performs as a date. Even before a kiss has been given, the physical, sensual aspect of the relationship has taken priority.
    Next, the relationship often steamrolls toward intimacy. Because dating doesn't require commitment, the two people involved allow the needs and passions of the moment to take center stage. The couple doesn't look at each other as possible life partners or weigh the responsibilities of marriage. Instead, they focus on the demands of the present. And with that mindset, the couple's physical relationship can easily become the focus.
    And if a guy and girl skip the friendship stage of their relationship, lust often becomes the common interest that brings
    the seven habits of highly defective dating
    the couple together. As a result, they gauge the seriousness of their relationship by the level of their physical involvement. Two people who date each other want to feel that they're special to each other, and they can concretely express this through physical intimacy. They begin to distinguish their "special relationship" through hand holding, kissing, and everything else that follows. For this reason, most people believe that going out with someone means physical involvement.
    Focusing on the physical is plainly sinful. God demands sexual purity. And He does this for our own good. Physical involvement can distort two peoples perspective of each other and lead to unwise choices. God also knows we'll carry the memories of our past physical involvements into marriage. He doesn't want us to live with guilt and regret.
    21 Physical involvement can make two people feel close. But if many people in dating relationships really examined the focus of their relationships, they'd probably discover that all they have in common is lust.
    4. Dating often isolates a couple from other vital relationships. While Garreth and Jenny were dating, they didn't need anyone else. Since it meant spending time with Jenny, Garreth had no problem giving up Wednesday night Bible study with the guys. Jenny didn't think twice about how little she talked to her younger sister and mother now that she was dating Garreth. Nor did she realize that when she did talk to them, she always started her sentences with "Garreth this..." and "Garreth said such and such..." Without intending to, both had foolishly and selfishly cut themselves off from other relationships.
    By its very definition, dating is about two people focusing on each other. Unfortunately, in most cases the rest of the world fades into the background. If you've ever felt like a third wheel
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    hanging out with two friends who are dating each other, you know how true this is.
    Granted, of all dating's problems, this one is probably the easiest to fix. Yet Christians still need to take it seriously. Why? First, because when we allow one relationship to crowd out others, we lose perspective. In Proverbs 15:22 we read,
    "Plans fail for lack of counsel, but with many advisers they succeed." If we make our decisions about life based solely on the influence of one relationship, we'll probably make poor judgments.
    Of course we make this same mistake in any number of non-romantic relationships. But we face this problem more often in dating relationships because these relationships involve our hearts and emotions. And because dating focuses on the plans of a couple, major issues related to marriage, family, and faith are likely at stake.
    And if two people haven't defined their level of commitment, they're particularly at risk. You put yourself in a precarious position if you isolate yourself from the people who love and support you because you dive wholeheartedly into a romantic relationship not grounded in commitment. In Passion and Purity, Elisabeth Elliot states, "Unless a man is prepared to ask a woman to be his wife, what right has he to claim her exclusive attention? Unless
    22 she has been asked to marry him,