Honor Reclaimed (All About Honor) Read Online Free PDF Page B

two later she finally sat
back on the floor too weak to get up.   She looked up at John wanting to be grateful for his assistance, but
feeling too miserable at the moment.
    “Let’s get you back to bed,” he said
as he assisted her to stand.   Taking her elbow, he guided her back into the sleeping chambers and
towards the bed.   “Your sister use
to suffer in much the same way in the early months of her pregnancies
too.”   He tried to be compassionate
although it took some effort.
    “Pregnancy?   Oh my God, I thought it was only
nerves.   Do you really think I am
pregnant?   It only happened
once.   How could I be pregnant?”   Eirian was half hysterical.
    John stopped and stared down at his
young wife.   “Eirian, I am sorry if
this comes as a surprise, but why do you think I felt it was necessary for us
to marry so soon?   It was always a
possibility and I was trying to protect you as much as possible after the
damage was already done.”
    Eirian, instantly feeling protective
of the life she carried, placed her hand possessively over her stomach, “Is
that what this baby will be to you…damage?   Maybe I should return to my father’s home and raise my baby
alone there.”
    He grabbed her by the hair on the
back of her head and forced her to look at him, “You are not leaving this manor
and you are not taking my child away from here, is that understood?   What is mine is mine and you are mine
now as is the child you carry.   I
will not have it raised by some one else nor will you embarrass me by
leaving.   Is that clear?”   He looked down into her shocked face,
“I repeat, do I make myself clear?”   He was ashamed to see the fear in her eyes just before she broke down
into tears.   He was instantly remorseful.   He could not stand to see her cry,
especially since he knew he was the cause.   He gathered her in his arms and stroking her back until her
tears subsided.  
    Never being one who could stand a
woman’s tears John said, “I am sorry.   I did not mean to be so harsh.   I think we need to start over again.   I have been blaming you for what happened, because I could
not bear to take the shame.   I am
the adult in this relationship.   You are just a little more than a child yourself.   I should have protected you.   Instead I took advantage of your
vulnerability.   Hell, I raped you.   I did not mean to.   I was so confused.   I wanted you to be your sister so badly
that I made myself believe it.   It
was not your fault, but I have been blaming you and I am sorry.   Would you be willing to try to start
over?”   He hung his head and ran
his finger through his hair pushing it back from his face.   He looked at her, smiled ruefully, and
said, “Your sister asked me not to grieve for too long and to go on with my
life.   I suspect she did not know
how fast I would comply with her wishes.”
    “Do you think it is possible that we
can make a normal life together?”   She asked, wanting so to be hopeful.
    “I really do not know, but I want to
give it a try.   I think we can make
our marriage work.   We have to at
least try for the children’s sake.”   He drew her into his arms, and after only a moments hesitation he
lowered his mouth to hers and kissed her tenderly.
    The kiss affected both of them more
than either would have expected.   They drew back from each other, searching one another’s eyes and then
came back together in a searingly passionate
kiss.   Eirian was the first to pull
away.   “I do not think we need to
rush anything, but judging by that kiss, I am feeling more hopeful.   Excuse me while I throw up again…” she
managed to say as she ran back to the basin.
    John rang for the chambermaid.   When she arrived, he requested that
breakfast be served in the room.   He made the mistake of mentioning that her mistress was not herself this
morning.   The comment was met with
a knowing smile and a smothered giggle.   He had almost