bringing the kids, too. They’re looking forward to seeing their big brother in his cap and gown.”
Hilary knew she ought to be praying, asking God to give her the right words. She ought to be asking for wisdom. Father, why do I feel like she’s trying to shake me up? “You’re asking me to make your hotel reservations? For all of you?”
“Well. After all, Hilary, you are the one who knows the area.”
“Eric knows the area. You could have called him instead,” Hilary pointed out.
A brief pause on the other end of the line. “You sound like you don’t want us to come for Seth’s graduation.”
Maybe this was the time for Hilary to say something sarcastic or funny, something to make Pam realize that she couldn’t step
in and turn this family upside down anymore. Hilary had worked her way through so many emotions during these past years. She’d
grieved. She’d grown stronger. She’d learned to be honest with herself. She wasn’t about to say something that might open
old wounds now.
After a lump of silence that felt like it was bleeding between them, Pam spoke in a lowered voice: “Hilary, what you’re doing
isn’t fair. We’re setting this up for Eric’s sake.”
“Are we? I thought graduation was a ceremony for Seth.”
“Seth is Eric’s son and I am Eric’s wife. We have every right to be involved in this special occasion.”
“ Eric has every right to be involved.” The rest of it hung between them without being spoken.
“Why don’t you come right out and say it?” Pam asked. “Why don’t you admit how much I threaten you, Hilary? Because Eric and
I stand a better chance of making our marriage work than you two ever did.”
A seagull drifted in easy circles overhead, his wings trained into the air, his unblinking eyes searching the ground. He was
off-course, Hilary thought. What was he doing so far from the lakeshore? “What are you trying to do?” Hilary asked, her voice
hard.
“Eric didn’t think you’d have problems with me coming with him. I’m a part of Seth’s life, too.” Hilary realized that the
two of them had discussed how she might react. Hilary was standing on the curb beside North Central Avenue, the ends of her
hair and the hem of her skirt lifting and curling as cars whipped past. She screwed up her nose at the damp air tinged with
sulfur; Chicago was known for its disagreeable smells. But that wasn’t the reason Hilary felt like she was being smothered.
Pam seemed to be waiting for her to agree to make those reservations. And she would never do it.
“I’m sorry, Pam, but I have to let you go.”
“Oh, right,” Pam said. “You were out with your friends. I forgot.”
“Send me your plans when you make them. I’d like to know where you decide to stay.” Hilary flipped her cell phone shut with
guilt-ridden satisfaction.
When she hurried back to the booth inside, Gina, Kim, Julie, and the others were stacking plates, busing the table themselves.
Everyone was in a hurry. Their time was up, and heaven only knew where their conversation had gone since Hilary had left them.
It didn’t matter. Hilary felt incapable of joining in again. She’d been blindsided by Pam’s call. No more joking about frequent-flyer
miles and trips to Times Square. When she caught her friends staring, she realized they must have been able to read it on
her face.
“Who was that ?” Gina said.
“I can’t believe she called.”
“Who?” Julie asked.
“I can’t believe I let that woman pull me down to her level. I almost lost it. I can’t believe anyone in the world could make
me feel that defensive. ”
“Who?” Donna said.
“Eric’s wife,” Hilary said, hating the way her composure finally crumbled, how her voice sounded as thin as a hurt child’s
instead of like someone who might actually be able to stand up for herself. “I guess Eric’s bringing the whole family for
graduation. She called wanting me to make hotel