operations, and we were all expected to do what she said. She found the jobs, Jace got the money, and we were all tools to her, pack mules. Respect went out the window, but the money was too easy. None of us cared enough to fuck up a good thing, least of all me.
But it wouldn’t last forever, even though for a long time life had been static, a flat line of daily repetition, working to save, saving for the goal. At some point, it would end. Jilly would graduate college, or I’d have enough saved to pay for it. One day I wouldn’t have a reason to stay. I’d be free.
I just didn’t know how to be free.
That afternoon, I leaned against the ivy-covered wall with my hands in my jacket, thumbing the envelope of cash folded inside. The bell rang in the old building behind me, and I pushed away from the wall, looking through the rungs of the cast iron gate to watch kids in uniforms pour out of the building like ants, a mass of teenagers moving like a single unit.
Jill found me almost immediately and smiled with her black ponytail swinging behind her, the apples of her cheeks pink and green eyes bright. She was a younger version of me, and it was like looking into some alternate universe as she clutched her books to her chest and wound her way around people. She pulled me into a hug.
“Hey,” she said with a squeeze.
“Hey, Jilly.” I squeezed her back, smiling as I pulled away. “How was school?” I asked when we started walking.
She shrugged. “Same old. AP English is killing me slowly, but I’ll survive. How’s the harrowing life of a bike messenger and acrobatic hobbyist? Any near-death experiences lately?”
I laughed. “Nothing of note.” My smile fell. “How are things at home?”
Jill looked down at her oxfords. “You know how it is. I spend most of my time at Sarah’s house. I stay out of Mom and Dad’s way, and they stay out of mine.”
“Just remember,” I said dramatically.
“At least they weren’t Aunt Gina,” we recited and laughed.
“I know, I know.” Jill waved a hand. “Living with that crazy drunk would have been way worse than parents who couldn’t give a shit about their kids. At least they didn’t abuse us. Just ignored us.”
“Like the time I landed in juvi for breaking into that old mall in Jersey and Mom left me there without so much as a phone call.”
“Well, you turned out okay, and so will I.”
My heart lurched. “Small miracles. I can’t say I didn’t enjoy the freedom when I was your age.” For all the good it did me. “I just paid tuition for the semester, so you’re all set. Brought you some cash too. Need me to buy you some booze?” I handed her the envelope with a smirk.
“God, you’re so loose, you know that?” She shook her head as she took it and pulled her backpack around to put the cash in a pocket. “I think I’m good on the underage drinking. I’ll never get into Stanford if I get arrested at sixteen.”
“You’d be surprised at what they’d be willing to look past for straight A’s and tuition in cash.”
She laughed, flashing her mega-watt smile, and the urge to get away slipped over me. Being with Jill was always confusing, just like trying to make sense of the twisting, gnarled vines that covered the wall we walked past. Every leaf was a choice I’d made, a wish I had, a feeling I pushed to the back to wither in the shade. I loved Jill and wanted to be there for her, but I couldn’t let her in, couldn’t let her see me, not when I couldn’t make sense of any of it myself.
She had no idea where the money came from. If she did, she would revolt. All the work, all the bullshit with Jade … it would all be for nothing if Jilly wouldn’t let me help her. And if she knew I’d been stealing to pay her way, she’d never accept another penny from me.
I looked away. “So, I can’t really hang—”
Jill smiled, though her eyes held the weight of sadness behind them. “I know. Cory, thank you. For
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