Gooney Bird Greene Read Online Free PDF

and Mrs. Pidgeon blushed.
    "Well," she said, "I thought I'd wear my new shoes today." Usually Mrs. Pidgeon wore soft, comfortable shoes. But today she was wearing very shiny high-heeled shoes with gold buckles.
    The principal, Mr. Leroy, made announcements on the intercom. He announced a bake sale and a birthday and a meeting of the crossing guards.
    A fifth grade boy read a poem about Christopher Columbus over the intercom. Everyone in the school said the Pledge of Allegiance together. Then it was time for school to begin.
    But Gooney Bird wasn't there.
    "Well," Mrs. Pidgeon said, "let's take out our social studies books, class. Let's turn to the chapter called 'Cities.'"
    "But Gooney Bird isn't here!" Nicholas called.
    "No," Mrs. Pidgeon said, "she isn't. She seems to be absent today. Maybe she has the chicken pox."
    The class was silent. The room seemed sad. The lights seemed dim. Even the gerbils, who usually scurried noisily around in their cage, were very subdued. George Washington, in his portrait on the wall, looked as if he might cry any minute.
    Slowly the children took their social studies books from their desks and turned to the chapter called "Cities."
    Keiko began to cry very quietly. "I don't want to do social studies," she whimpered. "I feel too sad."
    Malcolm crawled under his desk and curled up in a ball.
    Suddenly the door to the room burst open.
    "It's Gooney Bird!" everybody called. The lights seemed to brighten. The gerbils began to run in a circle, and George Washington seemed to smile.
    Gooney Bird was out of breath. "I'm sorry I'm late," she said. "I am never, ever late for anything. I always set three alarm clocks, and I lay out my clothes the night before, and I even put toothpaste on my toothbrush before I go to bed so that I can brush my teeth quickly in the morning! But today—
    "Wait," she said. "I have to catch my breath." She stood in front of the class and took a few deep breaths. "There," she said. "I'm fine now."
    She smoothed her red hair, which was flying about, and tucked it behind her ears. Today Gooney Bird was wearing gray sweatpants, a sleeveless white blouse with lace on the collar, and amazing black gloves that came up above her elbows.
    "This morning," she explained, "I quite unexpectedly had to direct an orchestra."
    "An orchestra?" asked Mrs. Pidgeon.
    "Yes. A symphony orchestra."
    Mrs. Pidgeon smiled. "I hear all sorts of interesting excuses for tardiness, but I have never heard that one before."
    "I believe I'm unique," Gooney Bird said.
    "Yes, you are, indeed. Did you wear your gloves when you were directing the orchestra?"
    "Yes," said Gooney Bird, "as a matter of fact, I did. I found them very helpful."
    All of the second-graders had their hands in the air and

    were pretending to lead orchestras. Even Malcolm was back in his seat, using two pencils as orchestra batons.
    Gooney Bird headed toward her desk. She looked around at the other children's open books. "I see we're in the middle of social studies," she said.
    Mrs. Pidgeon slipped one foot out of a high-heeled shoe and rubbed it with her hand. Then she put her shoe back on. "Actually," she said, "I think the class would appreciate it if we held story time a little early today."
    "YAY!" called all the children, and they closed up their social studies books.
    "A Gooney Bird story?" Gooney Bird asked.
    "Yes," said Mrs. Pidgeon.
    "YES!" called all the children.
    Gooney Bird smoothed her long gloves. She went back up to the front of the room. "Which one would you like today?" she asked. "'How Catman Was Consumed by a Cow'?"
    "I'd certainly like to hear about Catman and the cow sometime," Mrs. Pidgeon said. "Maybe tomorrow? But this morning I'd like to hear one called 'Why Gooney Bird Was Late for School Because She Had to Direct a Symphony Orchestra.'"
    "Oh," Gooney Bird said. "All right. I could tell that."
    "And it will be absolutely true?" asked Mrs. Pidgeon.
    "Of course," Gooney Bird said. "Have you forgotten? All of