God Rob Ye Merry Gentleman Read Online Free PDF Page B

your immediate enjoyment.
    â€˜What are you playing at?’ hissed Lady A as they headed out of the library.
    â€˜I’ve already been here – came in through one of the servants’ entrances – as Beauchamp suggested that it would take for ever to hand every item out individually. I’ve got a couple of men in the drawing room waiting to take statements as to what belongs to whom, and they can have a great game of identifying what they have individually lost. We obviously can’t let them take them away with them, for they will be needed as evidence, but we can at least label each item as to its rightful owner, and they’ve already been checked for fingerprints.’
    This was all mumbled through his thick cotton wool beard and was quite difficult to understand. What wasn’t so hard to comprehend was that the DS had a lively sense of humour and great goodwill.
    â€˜And as this way won’t take so long, it won’t spoil your party,’ the sergeant concluded.
    â€˜What a lovely man you are – for a policeman.’ Even Lady Amanda was mellow on this special evening of the year. ‘Are you sure you and Beauchamp aren’t in any way related?’
    â€˜I hardly think so.’
    â€˜Well, you should be. And this being Christmas Eve, which couldn’t be passed without a reference to Dickens’ old curmudgeon, what is Inspector Moody doing to pass the festivities?’
    â€˜He’s gone, from long tradition, to his sister’s house in Norwich.’ Glenister’s grin suddenly got very wide. ‘They hate each other like poison, and she’s got five unruly children, all of whom wake up at about three thirty on Christmas Day to tear open their stocking presents, apparently taking them into their uncle’s room so that he can share in the excitement of what they received. His sister always makes sure there’s a plastic whistle in one of the parcels, and a tin drum in another; possibly even a kazoo.’
    Lady Amanda grinned. Her cup of Schadenfreude was indeed running over. ‘How absolutely delightful. I shall be sure to avoid his company until well into the New Year so that he’s had adequate time to recover his usual charm and bonhomie.’
    Glenister laughed and accepted a glass of the champagne cup with which the Beauchamps were circulating amid the ‘oohs’ and ‘ahs’ of delight as people recognised their pilfered possessions. It was a very jolly party indeed that set off for Midnight Mass, and Lady Amanda had asked the sergeant if he would like to join them. ‘Would it be right, Father Christmas turning up at one of the holiest services of the year?’
    â€˜The clergy would absolutely love it, and many parents take their children along to the service, knowing that the little ‘darlings’ will sleep until later in the morning if kept up so late. Trust me, you’ll go down a storm in your red suit. She extended an arm to him and he took it, the two of them marching down the steps from the front door and off towards the Rolls.
    During the service, while her guests were singing the carols with unusual gusto, Lady Amanda quietly questioned Glenister. ‘And did you get the miscreant responsible for all these petty, mean thefts?’
    â€˜Of course we did. Beauchamp was absolutely right. He worked in an insurance office for a few months before he was sacked, but he had gathered a large amount of information about particularly meaty policies and the addresses to which they applied.
    â€˜It was then a piece of cake to gather together some of his children’s friends to make a carol party – some of them are particularly musical. When they’d enchanted the house owners, his son would ask to use the lavatory then pretend to get lost. Most houses, even the posh ones, usually have an engagements calendar either in the owner’s office or the kitchen. We’re talking older people