Girl In Pieces Read Online Free PDF Page A

head. “I don’t want to talk to him. I am half afraid nothing he said would make me feel better and half afraid I’d forgive him no matter what the reason. I’m not the girl he wants. I just need to deal with that.”
    “Oh sweetie, I just don’t think it’s that simple. You guys have ages of history. Maybe he’s not able to switch gears that fast.”
    “Or, more like he’s had someone in his life all this time that he just never told us about. God, Julie, what else hasn’t he told me? I don’t want to know.” I rested my head on my friend’s shoulder and she tightened her hold on me. “I don’t think I ever really knew him at all. And that really sucks.”
    “Please consider talking to him. You need answers. You deserve answers.”
    Julie’s phone went off somewhere inside the couch, causing her to scramble to find it lost in the cushions. She balanced her mug on one boney knee with one hand and clicked the screen on with the other. She read the message that had set it off, then handed it to me. It was from Tyler, naturally.
    Miss you.
    Once upon a month ago, Josh had sent me messages like this one. Some were merely cute ploys to exploit me for free labor. Some were random with no other purpose than to talk to me. His messages made my day, my night, my year. I had no idea back then how anxious I was to hear from him, or how much his worry meant to me.
    You alive?
    I made dinner. Get your ass over here.
    Turn off your computer and go to bed.
    Come be my inventory slave. I ordered pizza. Your favorite – garlic, Alfredo sauce, artichoke hearts, sausage, & sundried tomatoes. How do you eat this shit? It’s revolting.
    Brian says call your mom. Also I want my coffee maker back you wretched little thief.
    Can’t sleep. Come over.
    I ran my thumb across the message. Two words that meant everything and nothing in particular all at the same time. I couldn’t remember Josh ever saying he missed me, but he had invited me over in the middle of the night so often I had my own pillow. We’d fall asleep watching late night talk shows, eating popcorn in bed, or regaling each other with the boring details of our lives. Maybe we never gave each other the chance to be missed.
    Sometimes, on those strange late nights, he’d seem lonely and distant and so unlike him. At the time I thought it was because he had to come home alone again when he should have had companionship, affection, sex, just like everyone else in the world. He certainly deserved it. I knew now that when he came home late it was most likely from a party where he’d played someone’s Master. Michelle, maybe, or someone else just as lovely and experienced.
    Now I wondered if his loneliness was because he had this huge secret and no matter how good he was at it or how happy it made him, he could never tell us. He couldn’t bring his playmates home like dates and for whatever reason he couldn’t find both submission and companionship in the same person. That would make anyone lonely. Instead he only had me in the hours after and I was obviously a rather poor replacement for the extraordinary physical bliss that bondage and submissive gifted those who played the game. I’d tasted that world for barely a second and I still craved it in the days and weeks later. I couldn’t imagine how difficult it was for Josh to come home to such a poor consolation prize.
    Miss you.
    “Gross.” I wrinkled my nose at the message and smiled despite the ache in my chest. “Does he always send you perfectly sweet, loving messages randomly on his own just because?”
    “Yes. Sometimes when I am working late at the lab, he has dinner delivered from one of my favorite restaurants. Just because.” Julie wrinkled her nose back at me. “Should I be worried?”
    “He’s obviously a robot. Or an alien. Something unnatural and tentacle-y beneath his human shell.” I handed the phone back to her. “You must kill it with fire before it’s too late. I’m afraid it’s the