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defeated.”
    “Even a love lost?” I asked in all sincerity, watching the window again.
“Even that love lost.”
A bird landed on the sill, its tiny head robotically searching for food that wasn’t there.
“You have no idea what you’re talking about.”
    She stared at me hard, her jaw clenched. She leaned closely to me to drive her point home.
    “Trust me, Ethan Moonsong, I know anger. I’ve lived anger, and I had every right to seek the revenge I so badly wanted but hear this, know this, revenge is a slippery slope . The eye for your eye never satisfies. You may achieve your goal but the reward is never as sweet as you imagined it.“
    I shut her out. I was unwilling to hear her words of unburden, of relief. Only, one thing burned me with curiosity. “And what do you know of anger?”
    “Enough,” she explained, avoiding eye contact.
    I smiled. “It seems neither of us is willing to talk about what we really want to hear the other has to say.”
    She smiled back. “It’s high school all over again.”

 
    CHAPTER FIVE
     
                  Finley dropped me off at the bar after breakfast, and I waved goodbye as she drove away in her rickety navy blue VW Bug that reeked of oil. I watched her drive away and wondered if I would see her again before she left for Vietnam.
                  I found it so odd that she would choose Vietnam, not that I knew anything that even went on in Vietnam, but she was proving to be just as tight-lipped about her life as I was. It seemed we had that in common. I was curious, though, about her life, about her attitude about said life. Maybe it was because I considered her more an old friend than she thought me. Maybe it was because I was pathetic and was desperate to hold on to anything that could distract me from the chaotic crappy life that was my own.
                  I got in my truck and stuck the key in the ignition, ready to return home but was immediately struck frozen mid-crank when Spencer Blackwell’s truck sped past me on Main.
                  My heart pounded, raced with adrenaline, and my palms started to sweat. I turned the key but my truck wouldn’t start, and I began to panic.
                  “Come on, come on, come on,” I begged her. I tried again and again to start her but she wouldn’t turn. “Damn it!”
                  I paused, my hand resting on the key, and gritted my teeth. I cranked the key as hard as I could and felt the rush of relief when she turned over and the engine rumbled to life. Tearing out of the lot, I felt invigorated. I didn’t have a plan, but I knew I needed to follow him.
                  I took a left onto Main and spotted him two blocks ahead sitting at a stop light. I sped up a bit so I wouldn’t lose him but not so close that he could recognize me. That tingling rush adrenaline gives you tumbled through my veins, but there was a sick feeling in my gut I’d never felt, and I didn’t recognize the source. I chalked it up to the drinking and hitting my head from the night before and ignored the sinking feeling it was something else. Instead, I focused on keeping him in sight.
                  He approached the light at Third and came to a stop, turning on his blinker to turn left. I drove past him but kept him in my rearview then took a left at the next street and another then came to a stop right before Third so I could watch him. His light turned green and I thought he’d turn left but he made a U-turn instead, and that’s when I knew exactly where he was going. Ceres Bakery. I took a deep, shaky breath. And I also knew who he was with. Because it was her favorite.
                  I took a left then a right to get back onto Main, drove past his truck and parked in front of the flower shop she and I intended to hire for our wedding a few stores down. My hands shook on the steering wheel as I contemplated my next move.