Forever Scarred Read Online Free PDF Page A

as he imagined her hair blonde tumbling across her naked shoulders and he felt as though someone had punched all the air out of him. He couldn’t seem to find enough of it to breathe.
    With her full figure, heart shaped face and full red lips, she was the most beautiful woman he had ever seen in his life.
    He dragged in a ragged breath and shook himself as he stepped away from the door. He bent to begin tugging off his waders furiously. There was absolutely no point in thinking about the woman, she was way out of his league, but his heart wasn’t listening to his head.
    Lucy. The name rolled off his tongue and he closed his eyes as the vision of her swept over him again. Her breasts had filled the white shirt she wore under the black jacket and her hips splayed wide beneath the tiny waist. He had seen how round and perfect her ass was as he first walked into the hall. Now he just wanted to feel it in his palms, to glide his hands up that perfect body and mold those beautiful breasts with his fingertips, to put his lips to her nipples and flick his tongue across their tightening peaks while she cried out his name as he took her.
    H e began to sweat as his mind flipped between the gorgeously erotic pictures of her in his bed.
    Shit!
    H e was in deep trouble and he knew it.
    He stood up straight again without taking off the waders and blew out the breath he had been so desperate to pull into his lungs. There was no way any of those dreams were going to happen. He caught sight of the reflection of himself in the scullery window and winced as he saw a stranger staring back at him. He wondered if he’d ever get used to the shock as he took in the multitude of scars, the black eyes and crappy, swollen nose.
    What woman would ever want him now? He had never considered himself anything like good-looking in the first place and any relationships had been difficult enough before being blown to shit. Army life was hard, with long months of separation and worry. It was not what most women wanted. And even if any of those that did fancy a bit of a thrill with a big, tough army guy had come on to him, it wasn’t what he was looking for. He had never been a one night stand type of man. He wanted a woman for keeps and not just a few hours of unfulfilling passion.
    He didn’t think that he would ever have any type relationship now. He’d only had sex once since the bomb that had ruined him and even then he’d had to pay for it, something he swore he would never do again. He had come away from the mercifully brief encounter feeling dirtier than he had ever been before, even filthier than when he was up to his neck in dust and sand while out in Afghanistan.
    He glanced back at the closed door and listened as he heard heels clipping across the tiled floor towards the staircase. He knew it was Lucy. Ellen tended to wear flat pumps even when dressed up, which wasn’t often these days and David’s wife Geraldine, never ‘clipped’ at anything. She had more of a slinky, graceful glide that she managed to keep up under all situations.
    He thought about the evening ahead. There was no way he could sit in Lucy’s company during dinner. He wouldn’t be able to think of a damned thing but wanting her and as that was never going to happen he would rather he didn’t see her at all. He was going to have to put up with her making him sweat enough at the weekend when the rest of her group descended on them and he decided to put off the moment until then.
    He strode through the scullery and into the big kitchen. Patrick stood by the long kitchen table, a lethally sharp knife in his hand as he looked down at the enormous trout Joe had caught. He glanced up as Joe marched towards the back door.
    “Where are you going? I thought you were staying for dinner. I’m going to make a béarnaise sauce to go with this trout. It’s an absolute beauty.”
    His voice brought Joe to a sharp halt , his hand poised to turn the door knob. He didn’t look up at