Floods 10 Read Online Free PDF

like to believe in. It’s not so much that everyone is equal, but the idea that everyonehas an equal opportunity in life, which is also ridiculous when you think about it.’
    â€˜So if we have a Parliament, what are we going to do with it?’ Nerlin asked.
    Nerlin said he wasn’t against the idea of a Parliament as such, just that it had to be properly democratic.
    â€˜I mean, if we said that everyone who is a wizard or a witch could be a member of Parliament, that would be pretty fair,’ he said. ‘Because all of us are.’
    â€˜ I’m not,’ said Mr Hulbert. ‘Neither are my wife and children.’
    â€˜We could easily sort that out. I could just make you honorary wizards.’
    In the end it was decided that everyone who lived in Transylvania Waters could be a Member of Parliament. The building they had set aside to be the Houses of Parliament if they needed one was quite big. It had once been Transylvania Waters’s leading pickled gherkin factory, but even so there was no way the whole population would ever fit inside it. This of course would be the fifteenth building thathad been used as a government building. Most of the earlier ones had ended up being turned into pickle factories, not just pickled gherkins, but pickled cabbage, pickled socks and pickled estate agents, because it is a well-known fact that witches and wizards adore pickles. The last building had been turned into TV studios when the Floods had returned to Transylvania Waters and the one before that was now a very popular public lavatory. 20
    So it was then decided that everyone could be a Member of Parliament once a year on their birthday. It was assumed that lots of people wouldn’t bother anyway, so there probably would be enough room then.
    â€˜We’ll probably need to get some more chairs,’ said Nerlin. ‘So could you send down to that street where all the chair makers are and get, say, fifty new chairs?’
    â€˜Now, this is very interesting,’ said Mr Hulbert.‘If you had asked me that last week, I wouldn’t have had the faintest idea where to go, but since Mordonna and my beloved Edna have begun naming everywhere, I can be there in five minutes.’
    â€˜That is extremely useful,’ said Nerlin. ‘Because you never know when you might suddenly need a new chair. What’s the street called?’
    â€˜said Mr Hulbert.
    â€˜What a lovely name.’
    â€˜Isn’t it? There’s alsowhere they make all the sofas andwhere they make all the toilet seats.’

    When the fifty chairs had been delivered and set alongside the seventeen that were already there, a proclamation was sent out, which is like a sort of email without computers or any sort of internet and involved messengers running round the country shouting stuff at everyone. The proclamation invited anyone and everyone who wanted a say inthe running of Transylvania Waters to become a Member of Parliament.
    Ninety-nine-point-seven per cent of the population hadn’t the faintest idea what the messengers were shouting about, but then neither did the messengers.
    â€˜I don’t want to run anything,’ most people said. ‘Why run when you can walk?’
    â€˜Umm,’ was what the messengers replied. ‘You’re quite right.’
    So a second lot of messengers was then sent out with stuff written on sheets of paper which they gave to everyone.
    Ninety-nine-point-seven per cent of the population couldn’t read and neither could the messengers. It wasn’t that they were stupid. Far from it. They all knew what reading was, but couldn’t really see the point.
    â€˜I mean, we are a rural economy,’ they said. ‘We live in perfect harmony with our surroundings and want for nothing. How would reading make things any better than they are now? Would reading makeour turnips grow bigger? I don’t think so.’
    Of course there was always the remaining