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tattooed in stylised calligraphy resembling paint brush strokes. Not only was the colour of ink an almost identical match to my eyes, it complimented her flawless skin and stunning deep red hair perfectly. Four weeks later, Ronnie left my life, and I’d been fucking torn apart inside. I’m sure my external appearance wasn’t much better at the time, either. Some small part of me was glad she had my name inked on her skin before all that shit happened. She’d have to take me with her whether she wanted to or not. I’d always be a part of her, she would have to remember me and that thought alone gave me some small measure of peace. It’s funny how shit like that happens. People have told me, if you get a girl’s name tattooed, it’s the beginning of the end, I never believed in that shit. Maybe they’d been right. Maybe it had been an omen.
     
    Snapping me out of my memories that have nowhere to go but downhill, Ronnie continues. “Things changed when I was on my own, going to college, and getting an apartment by myself. My perspective on life got a little skewed for a while there. I thought I wasn’t enough. That I wasn’t……”
     
    Shaking my head emphatically, I stop her. She can’t really believe that shit can she? There was never once that she wasn’t enough for me. Fuck that. She was and still is everything to me. “No. Don’t say that shit. You were always more than enough, it was only ever you. You were too good for ME, Ronnie. You always have been. I felt like the luckiest son of a bitch alive that you wanted anything to do with me. It was me that wasn’t enough for you, Baby.”
     
    I hang my head back in my hands. The fact she ever thought she wasn’t enough for me, perfect for me, is almost too much to bear. “You didn’t let me finish Nate,” she says with her mouth pulled into a tight frown. “I felt like that for a while. After a few months, I realised it wasn’t about me at all. It might have killed me to see you with her, but you’d always had demons chasing you, things in your life you needed to escape from. I knew you weren’t all there that day. I looked into your eyes and they were so vacant. I’d never seen you like that, and you’d definitely never been like that WITH me. It was like you were looking through me, but not seeing me. My sister looked smug, like she’d won the lottery, so I knew something wasn’t right. I learned to accept you probably had little to no knowledge of what was going on.” I nod at her statement because I abso-fucking-lutely agree. I had no idea what the fuck was happening that day until about five minutes after she left. “I could forgive you quickly because of how much I loved you. That was the easy part. Accepting what happened took longer, a lot longer because my heart and my head weren’t in sync. Saying that, I made the decision that I’d never give my heart to anyone, ever again. That includes you.” I intake a huge lungful of air. That fucking kills, but what she says next hurts even more. “Part of me will always love the boy that needed me as a friend. The boy that made me laugh all the time, and part of me will always love the man that taught me how to love, but that’s where it ends for me. I can’t open my heart up to that kind of pain ever again.”
     
    I can’t believe it and I won’t accept it. I know I hurt her. Fuck, I hurt both of us, but I fucking love this woman with everything in me. Hearing Ronnie tell me she’ll never give her heart to anyone, including me again, causes the familiar feeling of gut wrenching, soul searing pain. If she thinks for a second I’ll give up on winning her back, she’s fucking mistaken. I heard everything she said, every single fucking thing. What she doesn’t realise is that I’m not that twenty-three-year-old idiot anymore and I’m going to do everything in my power to get her back. Even if that means fighting dirty. I understand what Cage was saying now about Kendall being made