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Tea is a luxury we ran out of four years ago. I remember the day I walked in the kitchen to see Diane slamming drawers in anger over the fact all the green tea was gone, her favorite.
    On each saucer is our daily allowance of multi-vitamins. We take them each night with a glass of water, and Mark hands us each our small plastic cup.  A different quantity is given for each person, based on his or her bodily needs. However, over the past year, we’ve been missing our vitamin E and fish oil capsules as bottles have emptied once and for all. I’ve never been bold enough to ask the question I think about, why take expired vitamins at all? It just points out everyone’s paranoia. I’ve looked it up in the dictionary: they match all the criteria. I can’t help but wonder if I do, too.
    Diane places a mug in front of me. I look towards Mom, bewildered as to what’s going on. Is this what she wanted me to avoid? She nods her head yes, ever so slightly, telling me not to drink what is in front of me.
    I look at the sachet in the water; there’s a tag at the end of the string reading “Chamomile.” I know what that is from my botany studies, but I’ve never seen these fancy bags before.
    “We saved them, Lucy, for a special occasion,” Dad says, putting his hand on mine.
    “What’s the occasion?” I look around the room, Diane’s stopped crying and Forest bows his head in his lap.
    “Just follow my lead, dear,” Dad says. I nod yes, turning at once to Mom, whose eyes are glazed over and still. “To new beginnings!” He lifts his mug and we all follow suit, holding ours up high, before bringing the tea to our lips.

 
     
     
     
     
    chapter five
     
    M om’s hand finds my knee, squeezing tight. I almost drop the teacup in my lap. Everyone around the table stares into the cup they hold, as they drink the hot liquid.  Setting their cups on their saucers, everyone bows their heads avoiding one another.
    My stomach drops as I look at my cup, and then Mom’s, both still full. Everyone else empties theirs quickly. For a moment I think no one notices me, and what I have or haven’t done, except for Mom. She steadies her breath as she sees my full cup, as though knowing I didn’t drink any of it, grounds her. But then, all at once, the table realizes what Mom and I haven’t done, and their shouts erupt around us
    “Drink it, Cecily!” Dad demands, his eyes suddenly wild, his face growing red.
    Dad reaches over the table, grabbing my shoulders in a slow motion move. He shakes me, yelling, and I look around the room, beginning to grasp what’s happening. With a foggy realization the family around me transforms into organisms I don’t recognize, as if the petri dish got clouded with a foreign substance.
    “Lucy, dammit. Drink the tea!” His words curdled in his throat.
    Diane points her finger at Mom and the room grows hysterical as screams fly towards us. Dad lifts a cup to my mouth, forcing me to drink the tea. My lips are sealed tight and I push him away.
    Diane stands, screaming at Mom to drink it now, but Mom just shakes her head, apologizing over and over, but then the shouts stop. I gasp, realizing Mom holds Diane up.
    “Help me,” Mom screams, straining to hold onto Diane, saving her from falling to the ground.
    Looking around to see who will jump to help, I notice Forest slumped down in his chair, looking towards the ceiling with his mouth agape. Mark leans hunched over his tea, mumbling words I can’t decipher, then stops, toppling towards the table.
    “Lucy, help me!” Mom yells again with a look of horror on her face. Before I can reach her, a sound stops me. I turn to face Dad, scared of what I will see.
    “All is well….” Dad says, staring straight at me. “All is well….”
    He falls back in the chair; matching the pose Forest holds.
    “What’s happening?” I scream at Mom, who sinks to the floor with Diane in her arms. “What’s going on?” My voice has never been this loud and I