Finding Gavin (Southern Boys #2) Read Online Free PDF Page B

disappearing out of my life and taking my brothers with you was best for me? I’ve spent my entire life thinking you ran because you didn’t want me. I have tried to find acceptance in all the wrong places and have forced myself to believe it was all I deserved.” I was doing everything I could not to get angry.
    “I’m sorry, baby girl. I am so sorry I did you and your momma wrong. I know that don’t change anything but I am sorry. You both deserved so much better than I ever gave you. All of you deserved better, even the boys. I split our family apart when I should have fought like hell to hold it together.” There was a light knock on the door just before it came open.
    My momma was standing in the doorway, looking on with unshed tears. “Your nurse is here.” My father nodded, and momma pushed the door open a little more. A middle-aged woman entered the room, and I excused myself to get some air.
    I walked outside and found a tree stump just beside the rundown garage, at the side of the house.
    Taking a seat, I pulled my phone from my back pocket. Looking at the screen, I noticed I had three missed phone calls from Gavin. My heart ached even more, seeing his name on my screen. Opening up his profile, I ran my finger over his photo with that sweet smile I captured on one of our good days together. My throat burned, because all I wanted to do was cry.
    I didn’t have the strength to call him back at that moment. I was sure that hearing his voice would push me over the top and crumble away what was left of my aching heart.
    Instead I called Kori, because I really needed her. I needed someone who would let me cave and fall apart without judgment.
    I had to get it all out—everything inside that felt like it was tearing me up. In the end, I knew I could count on her to pick me back up and give me the strength to move forward. She always seemed to know what I needed to hear. She didn’t sugar coat and say what I wanted to hear. She told me exactly what I needed to hear.
    Kori was sometimes the biggest pain in my ass, but mostly she was the person who reminded me that I was strong. She helped me face reality and knew that, in the end, I could get through anything.
    Kori is one of the strongest people I knew. My soul was in desperate need of a push I knew Kori was capable of giving me.

 
     
     
     
     
     
     
    Chapter Six
     
     
    We’ve spent the last four days with my father. With each day, he became weaker and more disconnected. It broke my heart to watch my father slowly let go. We all sat at his bedside until he took his last breath.
    An unexpected sob escaped me when the flat line stretched out over the monitor. I cried for the years I had lost. I cried onto my brother, Colt’s shoulder as he held me tightly. I would never get the image of my daddy, lying helpless, out of my mind.
    The funeral was a small service with a few of my father’s friends and his family. He was now at peace, and I hoped that my last conversation with him had given him peace as well.
     
    “I’m sorry I failed you, Maria. it is one of my biggest regrets.”
    I squeezed his hand gently. “I forgive you, Daddy. I need you to know that I forgive you.” His eyes pinched together tightly as his jaw trembled. He nodded his head lightly, and then he took a shuddering breath.
    The silence of the room was calming, as I continued to hold my father’s hand while he slept. I sat watching him and listening to his unsteady, strained breaths.
    I let go of my anger toward my father that day. I needed to let go of the hurt and move on. It was time for me to stop blaming him for all my wrongs. I needed to own up to the mistakes I had made in my life.
    I sat beside him until he took his last breath—an image I would never be able to let go of, one that would forever sit heavy on my heart.
     
    My brothers, Colt and Jake, would be taking care of the house and all my dad’s belongings. There really was nothing worth any value. Colt actually